REMEMBER! The Reminder You Need, to Lock In Your MOTIVATIONAL MINDSET

Your Motivational Mindset Will Make or Break You

We have to be willing to TRY New Motivational Mindsets Before You Write Them Off!

Are you too strict in your approach? Do you forget to pivot when your usual approach doesn’t work?

In PART 2 (linked at bottom), we met Mr. Wannabe Groom, who failed to realize how important it is to be willing to TRY new Motivational Mindsets before we write them off.

After all, it takes time and practice to make what’s Unfamiliar feel Familiar to us.

And that requires a willingness to give it a shot.

I know this all too well. This amnesia…This forgetting that we have to TRY new Motivational Mindsets.

Even though I eventually tried the “Going Soft” Motivational Mindset as an Attorney, and it allowed me to “Go Hard” even better than I had before…

When I decided to go all-in on my Attorney-to-Creative Journey at the start of 2024, I made the same mistake!

Due to pure amnesia, and the strong desire to “make it” with my Creative Work, I joined Medium and Substack and quickly subscribed to some of the top writers.

And, guess what, guys?

So many of them were “Going Hard,” saying things like:

• “You succeed when you work harder than the rest!”

• “Hustle! That’s the only way to achieve the life of your dreams!”

• “Write 500 words a day? Nah. 2,000 at the very least.”

• “Write one Note a day. Or, you won’t ‘make it’ because you won’t be seen.”

My feed was inundated with these messages to “Go Hard” at all costs, throughout the entire day.

Many days, it worked. I pushed myself to produce more, to do more, to make it perfect, to “Go Hard” like them!

But, then there were the days when I felt terrible because I’d read their “Go get ‘em!” Motivational posts and they didn’t land.

It didn’t make me want to do more.

It made me uneasy.

I felt it in my stomach, this clenching. Like I’d eaten something that’d gone bad.

The “Go Hard” mantras were starting to turn me away from my Creative Work.

Especially the more I tried to take steps outside of my comfort zone.

Indeed, the more I pursue goals outside of my comfort zone (like filming Videos for my YouTube Channel, or singing and performing music), the more my body has forced me to REMEMBER that I need to switch my Motivational Mindset.

The conscious part of me — looking back — is screaming, “Duh, Marisa!”

After all, learning to try and being able to switch between Motivational Mindsets is precisely what I had to do, to do well in law.

But, the subconscious part of me — the part of me that was raised to get the A+ and fears NOT being able to do that in the Creative field — allowed my fear to sway me.

Fear made me follow the seemingly “successful” Writers on Medium and Substack, to “Go Hard” because that’s what seemed to warrant their success.

But, I realized again…

“Going SOFT” Can Be The Better Entry-point

At least it is for me.

When I start by “Going Soft,” I can write about self-improvement because I believe it will interest and help others, and it interests and helps me.

When I “Go Hard,” I find myself too preoccupied with appeasing some damn algorithm, so my work can “be seen,” as if that’ll help me “make it.”

When I “Go Soft,” I care about writing in a way that not only communicates with readers, but also touches them emotionally.

When I “Go Hard,” I care about Views and Stats. Things that don’t even reflect true connection or engagement.

It’s not that “Going Hard” is wrong. Or that views and stats and metrics don’t matter; they do.

It’s just that “Going Soft” allows my body to relax. I’m not trapped in a fight/flight/freeze/fawn response, and that frees my mind to be creative. “Going Soft” has a positive effect on my mind and body, and that’s what allows me to do the work: To write. To create. To publish. To put in the reps.

Then, when that’s done, I have the mental and emotional bandwidth to analyze the views and stats and metrics from a place of wholeness, first.

To see all of it from a proper, healthy, and sustainable perspective.

What about you?

Does the HARD approach appeal to you?

Or, do you prefer going SOFT?

I find, after much reflection and experimentation, that I rarely gravitate to a “Go Hard” approach, anymore — at least not the scorched-earth variety à la David Goggins.

But, again, I am not RIGID about it anymore. If I try the “Go Soft” approach and it’s not working, I try a harder approach because I remember it’s what my mind and body needs right now that matters most.

And my mindfulness is growing. I’m remembering more often to ask myself the most important question before I start any task:

“What’s the Motivational Mindset I need, right now?”

Yes, the more I expand my comfort zone, the more attuned I have become to the importance of choosing the RIGHT Motivational Mindset.

So much so, I’m paying attention to the precise wording I use.

I don’t use the term “Go Hard” anymore.

“Hard” makes me think of something inflexible. While “Stern” seems better, like I’m pushing myself to expand my comfort zone in a way that’s stern, but fair.

I’ve also moved away from using “Going Hard” and “Going Soft” because that terminology seems to describe a Future Me. Like I’m transforming the Current Me into a hardened Future Me if I’m “Going Hard”; or, I’m transforming the Current Me into a softer Future Me if I’m “Going Soft.” Either way, this terminology of Going Hard or Going Soft makes me feel separate from my Future Self.

And I don’t like that.

If the aim is to focus more on looking inward, to be mindful and aware of my body and mind’s current physical, emotional, and mental state of Being, I’d rather describe the two Motivational Mindsets as:

Being SOFT

OR

Being STERN.

These terms help me to focus my attention inward on what I actually need right now, rather than focus my attention outward, on what other people might inspire me to do.

Ultimately, I feel a sense of fluidity, not rigidity, when I ask myself, “Do I need to be soft or stern with myself now?”

What do YOU think?

Do you think it makes a difference to reframe “Going Soft or Hard” as “Being Soft” or “Being Stern”?

Do you like to motivate yourself by looking outward, at what other people do?

Or, do you prefer to motivate yourself by looking inward, by observing what your body, emotions, and mind appear to be showing you?

Are you more motivated by metrics? Or by how certain tasks make you feel?

Do you alternate back and forth, between a Hard and Soft approach?

Or, do you stay stuck to just one Mindset?

Stay Tuned for PART 4: FLIP THE SCRIPT! Use FOMO to Your Advantage: Consider The Knowledge You’ll LOSE When You Write Off the “Wrong” Motivational Mindset

The Soft/Stern Sides in me honor & respect the Soft/Stern Sides in each of you,

Marisa

Read PART 1: STOP! The 1 Question to Lock In Your MOTIVATIONAL MINDSET

Read PART 2: BEWARE! The 2nd Question to Lock In Your MOTIVATIONAL MINDSET