The Secret to Unstoppable Self-Belief:

Maximize Meditation to Raise Your Self-Esteem

From my “How to Find Synergy” Series:

Mindful Mental Notes

Be Mindful! TAKE NOTE of all the positive things you do, each and every day!

How often do you find yourself feeling down?

Once a week?

Twice a week?

Numerous times a day?

If you don’t have a clue, be more mindful. Pay attention to your thoughts.

Take a day to observe your mind closely.

Count the number of times your thoughts are positive, negative, or neutral.

Tally them.

If your thoughts are predominantly negative, realize you do NOT have to continue living this way.

The solution is far easier than you might think.

THINK-DO-BE your way to Unstoppable Self-Belief: The Power of a Positive Mindset.

There are many reasons why we struggle to feel positive emotions and think positive thoughts in our lives.

Work responsibilities pile up on us.

We may not be getting along with our significant other.

Our kids might be struggling in school.

Many people may want our time and attention, and we feel obligated to give it to them, even if we feel depleted.

(1) THINK.

While all of these are legitimate causes for concern, and we do need to find ways to address stressful situations like these, we can’t find immediate solutions — not every time.

Even so, we can find immediate relief.

We just have to focus on one basic, fundamental truth:

RE-THINK: Your Low Mood Likely Starts with YOU

I say this, not to cut you or me down.

I say this, to empower each of us.

Because we hold the power to change our beliefs; we can change how we feel, by simply changing our perspective.

It all boils down to one decision: to adopt a Positive Mindset.

And the best time to do it is now.

But, what if things are going well right now? What if life’s already going your way?

You might think you don’t need to build a Positive Mindset, but that’s a mistake.

As the saying goes, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

It’s always better to cultivate a Positive Mindset before your life depends on it.

Because, eventually challenges arise.

Problems will always exist.

And we often make it harder on ourselves, because we fail to TAKE NOTE of all the positive things that we do.

Consider:

How many amazing things do we do each and every day, that improve our lives, and the lives of our loved ones — but, we gloss over them?

We boil them down to “just getting things done.”

We tell ourselves it’s simply “part of our routine.”

We just do it, without a second glance, and we move on with our day.

Glossing over our daily WINS, no matter how small, is a MISSED OPPORTUNITY.

When we fail to acknowledge the things that we do, we fail to see ourselves clearly.

It might seem like something small to overlook, but it’s NOT.

At the very least, it demonstrates that we’re living our lives without mindfulness. By failing to acknowledge the good that we do, we fail to recognize our Self as we truly are in the present moment.

At its worst, when done repeatedly, it can become a big problem, because it leads to low Self-Esteem.

What is Self-Esteem?

“Esteem” is a word that’s derived from the Latin word “aestimare,” which means “to estimate.”

Therefore, “Self-Esteem” means “self-estimation.”

But, “estimation” doesn’t capture the full meaning we give the word “Self-Esteem.”

When we refer to our “Self-Esteem,” mere estimation doesn’t cut it.

What we’re after isn’t just a vague approximation of our strengths and weaknesses.

What “Self-Esteem” really requires, is a realistic impression of oneself.

“Self-Esteem” is your estimation of who you believe you are. It is the opinion you have about yourself.

The problem is, if we never take the time to recognize the good that we do as we go about our lives, day by day, we’ve lost many opportunities to build up our Self-Esteem. Which means we will not have a realistic impression of who we are.

Even worse, when life eventually gets us down, it clouds our vision even further. Stress narrows our focus — we see only the problems and have a harder time seeing the wins we ought to be tallying in our favor, every day.

As the days and weeks and months and years progress, we “forget” what we do well for ourselves, and our self-estimation falls to the point that we put ourselves down or think we’re not as great as we truly are.

The truth is…

Most of the time, you DON’T have LOW Self-Esteem.

You just have an INACCURATE estimation of yourself.

(2) DO — Be Mindful: Build REALISTIC Self-Esteem

The easiest way to build high Self-Esteem, feel better about our lives, and believe we can handle the obstacles we face, is to give ourselves credit when credit is due.

The easiest way to do this, is to make it a part of our daily Mindfulness Practice.

If you’re feeling down, pause. Realize you are not seeing yourself clearly.

Then, force yourself to have a clear estimation of your positive attributes.

This isn’t about puffing yourself up beyond your actual capabilities. Or ignoring your faults.

It’s taking an objective, realistic look at your strengths and weaknesses, and taking the time to celebrate your wins — no matter how small.

Because they’re NOT small. They’re the present, moment-to-moment happiness that compounds into your entire, happy life.

Don’t take for granted the amazing things that you do — not once in a while, but every single day.

Again, this takes mindfulness.

Because our brains are apt to pay less attention to what’s familiar. Our brains often gloss over the great things that we do…

Especially if they’re part of our daily routine.

Our brains don’t seem to register them. Not really. Even if they move our needle forward.

We have to be mindful, then, so our brains will recognize the salient tasks that we complete, so we can celebrate them for the gains that they are.

The more we do this, the more Self-Esteem we will have, and the more confidence we will gain, knowing that we can do things to help ourselves THINK, DO, and BE better.

(3) BE — BE a Person with REALISTIC Self-Esteem

It only takes a few seconds, to be mindful and appreciate the good.

But when you make Mindful Self-Esteem a daily practice, it can make a tremendous difference in your mood and self-confidence.

I see the weekend as a time to relax and deliberately slow down. It’s also the perfect time to practice boosting your Self-Esteem.

Not by adding more to your To Do List, but by simply acknowledging anything good that you DO.

Even if it’s part of your regular routine.

Take this Sunday, for example. I made the following mental notes.

Mindful Self-Esteem Notes:

• 5am — Woke up, read, and wrote. And celebrated the fact that I’d honored my Creative Self by making time for this previously-neglected part of me.

• 6am — I Habit Stacked something I’d been dreading in the back of my mind (cleaning), with something I wanted to do (enjoy my morning coffee).

After a busy week, cleaning wasn’t what I wanted to do, but you know how it feels to have something on your To Do List that keeps bugging you? It depletes your mental energy, simply because it keeps popping up in your mind. So I knew I had to get it done; I didn’t want to waste my mental energy, to think about it anymore. I resisted the urge to postpone, did a deep clean, organized my things, and celebrated the immense joy of crossing off that To-Do.

Then I took a break, to enjoy my coffee and relish that great feeling of having done something I didn’t want but had to do. And as I took the time to celebrate my having done it, I realized that it wasn’t actually a “chore.” Because I love a clean house, I was looking forward to enjoying that cleanliness, and it was a great way to start the week, with one less stress to worry about. And — because I deliberately slowed down to think about it — I learned that a “chore” didn’t have to pull me down; I could view it as fuel to propel me forward.

• 7am — My Cold Shower. I’ve been doing this for about 2 months now. I absolutely love it. It allows me to prove to myself that I can do hard things, first thing in the morning.

This Sunday, I had an epiphany as I slathered myself in the most resplendent body wash, in the midst of the 50-degree water flow. I noticed my Self-Talk had changed — yet again — in a most unanticipated way, and there was my 3rd win for the day: that awesome feeling when inspiration suddenly strikes, with a great writing idea for another Cold Shower post!

• 8am — While the rest of my family enjoyed sleeping in, I entered the gym, for an intense lifting workout. I did my heavier sets on the weight machines. Then, attended my favorite Sunday lifting class. I love this instructor. She varies the routine from week to week. It gives me the muscle confusion that my body needs, so I never have to worry about a plateau.

As I drive back home, it’s not even lunchtime, and I’ve already accomplished so much.

And I feel BETTER than if I’d just gone through the motions, moving from one part of my routine to the next.

And it only took a few seconds to feel awesome.

To just see and acknowledge what I did, and count my wins.

In the present.

In the moment.

In an immediately beneficial way.

It’s built a stronger “Secure Attachment” to my Self and to my Family.

The more I do this, the more I can tell my Self-Esteem has grown. I see myself more accurately now. And, when I think of my shortcomings, I have more confidence to improve and grow.

Best of all, when I’m with my family, I’m able to focus on them.

I enjoy my time with them more.

More, because I took the time to take care of my own mindset first.

More, because I practiced mindfulness.

More, because I made having realistic Self-Esteem an integral part of my routine.

WHAT ABOUT YOU? Do you take the time to slow down, to give yourself the credit you deserve?

If not, why not?

Too many people get bogged down in their routines and the weekly grind of their jobs that they don’t slow down to truly nurture themselves, to really acknowledge their wins and build their Self-Esteem and confidence.

Society places so much importance on building our children up, on raising them to reach for the stars.

But, we shouldn’t forget that we deserve that, too — no matter what age we are.

Be your own cheerleader.

See and celebrate your each and every win.

Even when no one’s there to witness it, acknowledge your gains, always.

That’s how we can make the goodness last longer.

By practicing gratitude — for our Self.

You Are Worth It!

If you do nothing else for your mental health but this one little practice, you will be a much happier, healthier, more exuberant person.

Someone who’s enthusiastic about their life.

I feel better when I do this.

I hope you take the time to celebrate you, too.

Have a wonderful week filled with many moments, acknowledging all of the awesome things that you do!

The Self-Esteem in me honors & respects the Self-Esteem in each of you,

Marisa

🎤 📺 🎤

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Together, we’ll explore all the ways that we can 10x our life — mind, body, & soul.

We’ll learn the scientific, physiological, and psychological reasons why we are the way that we are, and combine that understanding with simple, active practices that will:

• Enliven our emotions & creativity;

• Enhance our efficiency & productivity;

• Foster a greater depth of Self;

• Build the Secure Attachment that we need to develop a Growth Mindset; and,

• Reprogram our minds to pivot from the Sympathetic Nervous System to the Parasympathetic Nervous System when we need it to, more often than not.

I’ve planned so many exciting & fun things to share with you (in addition to music!) and I can’t wait for you to get all the FREE goodies I’ve prepared for you.

We CAN do this, TOGETHER!

Marisa