Month: November 2024

Who are you, REALLY?! Be Brave + BREAK FREE!

Posted on by marisavictus

Who Are You, REALLY?!

Be Brave + BREAK FREE!

Imagine you’re ten years old, playing with Play-doh at the kitchen table.
You hear the sound of keys turning in the door. Your father’s coming in through the garage. You can tell from the sound of his boots that he’s knocking them together, to keep the dust from coming in from the construction site. He hangs his keys and reflective vest on the hooks in the laundry room, and walks inside to take a peek at what you’re up to.
He expects you’re playing with the new trucks he got you last month, and seems surprised to find you sculpting small teacups and bowls using the blue and purple Play-doh that’s soft and squishy in your hands.
You invite him to sit down for a cup of tea, but he shakes his head wearily and walks away, to take a hot shower, without another word.
Months pass. It’s Christmas and you eagerly open the gift he places in your hands. It’s wrapped quite clumsily in bright red paper, and you know Dad wrapped this himself. You grin, but can’t seem to shake the feeling that you’ll be disappointed again, when you can already see your little sister’s got the big art kit you’ve been asking for, for weeks.
Your father clears his throat as he looks at you with palpable anticipation. You can already feel the weight of the wheels in the palms of your hands, and you can tell from the sharp angle of the paper that it’s got an extendable scooping arm.
“It moves, just like the real ones!” Dad exclaims, as you pull off the last piece of paper on the side of the Excavator. Like one of the many trucks and tools that Dad uses at his job every day.
That night, you walk by your sister’s room and see her painting a cat on the easel opposite her door. You know exactly how you would angle the head to show a bit of playfulness in the cat’s expression, to make it look more like your family’s 8-year-old tabby, Cotton Socks.
You sigh momentarily, when you remember what your dad had said earlier that night, when he’d found you looking a little too long at her art set. “Girls just love art, don’t they? They’re not into building,” he’d said with a chuckle, “not like us guys.”
At bedtime, you close the door to your room and pull the covers up over your chest and nestle in. As you turn to rest your head on the pillow, your gaze falls to the side table, and you see them there: the Play-doh teacups that you’d made months before. You’d left them out on purpose, to harden, so you could put them here, on display. You remember the feel of the soft supple clay as you’d rolled and carefully shaped them into a matching set of saucers and cups.
As your eyes grow heavy, you fall asleep, wondering, Didn’t Santa get my letter? Why didn’t he know what I wanted?
And you dream a wonderful dream, of a studio filled with your art.
A decade later, those dreams have faded.
You walk into your apartment after a long day at the work site, managed by the same company your dad’s worked for, all these years. Your hair’s damp with sweat and your legs ache, but you don’t feel that same sense of satisfaction your dad always seemed to enjoy.
Something’s missing.
It’s always there, that ache in your stomach. But you can’t quite pin down what it is.
All you know is you thought you’d be fine by now. When he’d told you in your late teens to join him at the same company, you’d looked in his excited eyes and told yourself, It’s okay. I can do construction. You’d figured, At least I won’t be in a cubicle.
But, seven years later, you’ve grown weary of the days spent moving materials. Constructing, yes, but not making, not creating excitedly with your hands, the way you remembered it.
And the loud noises — the jackhammering, the traffic rushing by the site, and the loud and boisterous banter of the workers that surrounds you endlessly, makes you wish you were anywhere but here. You’re part of the crew, yes, they’ve accepted you wholeheartedly as one of the guys, but you long for the solitude you remember, when you had the freedom to do art. You remember it fondly, that time when the minute hand of the clock seemed to stop, when all you felt was a miraculous state of Flow.
How long has it been since I’ve felt that free? When was it? you wonder. You walk to the fridge, crack open a beer, then another, chugging em down in quick successive gulps and start to drift off, your neck curved against the back of the couch. Your eyes close as your thoughts begin to fade. I think it was sometime when I was still young, in grade school…When I was …when….
You fall asleep never quite remembering.
It’s the part of you that you’ve forgotten. It’s the side of you, you’d intentionally blocked.
Days later, you’re at the new job downtown. On a break, you walk down the street to gain some respite from the noise and find yourself confronted. Stopped in your tracks.
It’s an art store.
You wonder, When was the last time I was in one? You can’t remember if it was a JoAnn’s Fabrics or a Michael’s your mom took you to, but you must’ve been around 12, when your sister’s class project required her to create a diorama made out of popsicle sticks, glitter, and those fuzzy twistable pipes that come in all those colors. You remember your mom and sis’ stopping in an aisle to pick some up, when you snuck away to check out the paints and clay.
There were so many types and colors. There were canvases, large and small. You ran your hand along the kits. You wished you could have them all. In the blink of an eye, you imagined the entire aisle was your very own art studio.
Suddenly, the jackhammering restarts and you’re whisked back to reality, looking through the window of Blick’s Art Supply.
In your reflection, you see the man you are, dressed in head to toe construction gear, hard hat still on, but you can barely see him. The memory of your imagined studio’s all you see through the glass, as if those paint sets are yours, as if those canvases are beckoning you to become one with your past — to return to that time — and you feel it suddenly, that long-forgotten urge to create.
The last four hours of your shift fly by. You go through the motions, but your mind is elsewhere, on how many canvases and sets of paints you want to buy, in what colors, and what to paint? You don’t know. You just know that’s where you’ll be before the day ends. Standing at that register. Hauling your goods home.
That night as you make multiple trips from your truck to your apartment, the living room floor’s covered with so many materials, you can barely see the carpet anymore.
It’s a blur. You toss the open pizza boxes off the table and onto the kitchen floor. You set up the easel and you start to paint feverishly. You feel like an animal unleashed. Like there’s some type of creative creature bursting out of you.
By 3 AM, you’ve painted five pastoral scenes. You don’t know these places. They’ve entered your vision from some magical place. You don’t know from where, but you know you’re not stopping. You don’t even realize what time it is until it’s 7 AM and your boss is calling you wondering where the hell you are. But you let it go to voicemail because there’s no stopping this. There’s just you, and the canvas, and the brush in your hand, and this wonderful limitless sense of expression.
It’s freedom!
In your body, you feel it, this unwavering confidence. That you’ve finally found him: the boy you’d long forgotten.
And you realize, this is who you actually are.

Who are you?

Are you the boy?
Or are you the man?
If you’re the man, which one are you?
The man lulled into a false sense of security, who thinks It’ll be alright to make concessions and bargain with your life?
Or, are you the man who’s determined to be FREE, to become who you are truly MEANT to be?

Today, I dare you…

To remember.
To be brave.
To BREAK FREE.

The Bravery in me honors & respects the Bravery in each of you,

Marisa

If you would like to hear or see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, and you’d love to learn about the science of self-improvement, please Subscribe to my new YouTube Channel and signup for my free Substack Newsletter.

Together, we’ll explore all the ways that we can 10x our life — mind, body, & soul.

We’ll learn the scientific, physiological, and psychological reasons why we are the way that we are, and combine that understanding with simple, active practices that will:

• Enliven our emotions & creativity;

• Enhance our efficiency & productivity;

• Foster a greater depth of Self;

• Build the Secure Attachment that we need to develop a Growth Mindset; and,

• Reprogram our minds to pivot from the Sympathetic Nervous System to the Parasympathetic Nervous System when we need it to, more often than not.

I’ve planned so many exciting & fun things to share with you (in addition to music!) and I can’t wait for you to get all the FREE goodies I’ve prepared for you.

We CAN do this, TOGETHER!

Marisa

 

Are you serious about self-improvement
& want to have unstoppable self-belief?
Then SUBSCRIBE TO MY FREE SUBSTACK and entrain your brain the quick & easy way, with my daily Mindset & Meditation (M&M) practice. To learn how, click this link.
Every day, I write & share 1 handwritten M&M if you want to grow with me.

 

In addition, new Chapters for my serialized science fiction series (THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES) are released every weekend on Substack. Substack Subscribers can read the 1st Book in the series for FREE! Just click here to opt-in + receive my Fiction writing!

Attorney, Artist, and Author of THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES. Writer who believes in the power of words. Life-long learner who’s passionate about the science and art of self-improvement. 

Join me, as we explore the science and skills behind VICTUS, the path and practice that can silence our inner critic and free us to be our truest, authentic self. 

Want to Live a Happier Life, Filled with Synergy, Flow, and Freedom in Everything You Do? 

Then Sign-Up for The VICTUS Method Newsletter @ my Contact Page.

STRESS: Is it Real or merely a Myth?

Posted on by marisavictus

STRESS: Is it Real or merely Myth?

Let’s take a walk down memory lane

Did you know that Stress is DEBATABLE?

It is!
You’re probably wondering, How could that be? Everyone on Earth is stressed out — now more so than ever.
You tell me, “Of course stress exists! It’s existence cannot be questioned. The only people who don’t experience stress are either brain dead or buried six feet under the ground.”
Well, I thought so, too, until I started to look into the history behind the scientific study of stress.
And guess what?

Stress was once a hotly debated topic!

Indeed, in his book The Myth of Stress, Andrew Bernstein provides a fascinating overview of this decades-long debate.
In the 1930’s, one of the earliest pioneers of stress, Physiologist Walter Cannon at Harvard Medical School, recommended that the medical community pay attention to stress and its effect on the body.
It did, with great interest after World War II, when stress consumed the United States. The military wanted to know the best way to train soldiers to handle stress and, of course, there was an influx of returning soldiers suffering from what we now know to be PTSD.
One researcher in particular — Hans Selye, at Montreal’s McGill University — made great strides in the field of stress research, by studying the effect of physiological stress on rats. By exposing them to heat and depriving them of food, among many other experiments, Selye found that all stress generated three symptoms, commonly referred to as the “Triad”:

1.) The adrenal glands, that sit on top of the kidneys and produce epinephrine (adrenaline) and norepinephrine (noradrenaline), became enlarged;

2.) The immune system (specifically, the thymus, spleen, and lymph nodes) shrank in size; and,

3.) The stomach and intestines suffered from ulceration (bleeding ulcers).

Unlike situations where a specific stress response was produced via specific pathways — like shivering in response to cold, or sweating in response to heat — Selye believed that, underneath those specific responses, there was always this nonspecific physiological response.
As a result, Selye defined stress as “the nonspecific response to the body to any demand placed upon it,” because the type of stress did not matter. As long as an outside stressor was present, a physiological stress response would follow.
As a result of his work, including more than 30 books about it, Selye popularized the idea of stress.
To this day, we’re familiar with this concept of stress.
So much so, we’re all guilty of blaming outside events and people for “stressing us out.”
As if it’s an open and shut case; stressing’s inevitable; and the best thing to do is to find a way to accept the stress and cope with it, using different techniques, like relaxation.
Indeed, “Stress Management” became a popular movement in the 1950s and 60s, but then something shifted in the mid-1970s, when another research scientist, Dr. John Mason of the Walter Reed Army Institute of Research, and later, the West Haven VA Medical Center, and Yale University, decided to challenge Selye’s theory by modifying Selye’s experiments.
Instead of subjecting the animals to acute stressors like a sudden blast of heat, Mason increased the temperature very slowly and subtly, little by little.
Likewise, in experiments where Selye had completely deprived rats of food at meal times as the acute stressor, Mason provided the rats with food that lacked nutrition, but still allowed the rats to maintain social contact and eat non-nutritive food at the same time as the other rats.
Using these and other experiments, Mason was able to demonstrate that the physiological stress response did not occur.
This flew in the face of Selye’s theory. According to Selye, because the external stressor was applied, the rats should have had a physiological stress response.
But, Mason demonstrated that stress did not result. Why? Because he’d controlled the rats’ psychological response, resulting in little to no stress response.
Ultimately, Mason wrote a series of published articles explaining why Selye’s physiological theory of stress did not work, but a psychological theory did.

So there you have it!

We may be subject to many stress-inducing scenarios in our lives, but STRESSING OUT is entirely optional!
Contrary to what we might have believed, when something bad happens to us, we don’t have to be victims.
We don’t have to lay down and succumb to an inescapable physiological Triad.
Instead, we can take…

PRACTICAL STEPS: Let’s Apply this understanding to our lives!

When something goes wrong at work or something negative happens in our personal life, let’s remember to control our psychological emotional response.

1. We can realize that external stressors need not stress us out.

But how?
We can’t stop outside factors from butting into our lives. And we cannot change other people, either.
The only thing we can control is our own thinking…

2. We can change our interpretation of the external event or person.

This may not be easy but, changing our interpretation is the only way we can prevent our minds, emotions, and bodies from suffering needlessly.

3. This will strengthen our emotional muscle and, perhaps, over time, it will raise our immunity to outside stressors.

Is this achievable?

It is.

Just imagine the difference between two individuals:

When Mr. A was a young lad, he was nicknamed throughout the neighborhood as Mr. Politician. He loved to chat people up and was able to befriend anyone in 5 minutes. As an adult, he’s much the same. His boss asks him to make a presentation to 25 colleagues, and he’s immediately revved up and ready to go. He’s excited to show ’em what he’s got. There’s absolutely no nervousness, no fear. Yes, Mr. A’s someone who sees public speaking as an opportunity to shine, not a stressor that would generate a negative internal reaction — emotionally or physically.
Then you’ve got Mr. B. He’s always been the shy, quiet type. An introvert and deep thinker who doesn’t like to be in the spotlight. When his boss asks him to stand up and give a speech next week, he pictures all 25 colleagues staring him down and his throat immediately seizes up. It’s so jarring to his body and brain that the next morning, he’s got a terrible case of diarrhea, and he doesn’t report to work that day.
The only difference between these two individuals is the way that they interpreted the external scenario.
While Mr. B is clearly upset at the prospect of having to present, Mr. A is beyond excited. Mr. A eagerly counts down the days and, when the big day comes, he hits it out of the park.

What would the Experts say?

According to Selye, the mere presence of the external stressor (the presentation) should have produced a stress response in both Mr. A and Mr. B.
But, Mason’s research demonstrates that because Mr. A was able to control for his psychological response, the physiological stress did not follow. Sure, his heart rate may have increased, but he felt excited, and Mr. A’s body suffered no deleterious effects. He just had a great time and enjoyed presenting to his colleagues.

This is great news!

Because it means Mr. B has the power to change his story.
Let’s say the presentation’s not actually scheduled to occur until a conference, 6 months later.
What if Mr. B signed himself up for public speaking classes or joined a local Toastmaster Chapter?
He could slowly increase his comfort zone and, little by little, begin to see that he is capable of speaking eloquently in front of 25 people.
Perhaps a month before the conference, he’s gained so much experience, he’s spoken in front of a hundred people. In fact, his coach invited him to attend a Regional Toastmasters event, and he was selected as one of the best among the group!
Mr. B looks at his calendar. Sees the conference date circled in red and, for the first time, he’s not seeing red. Or brown in the toilet bowl…lol. Suddenly, the prospect of speaking to 25 colleagues is a piece of cake.
All because Mr. B took practical steps to control for his psychological response.
And it pays off! He comes back from the conference having changed a lot of people’s impression of him. He’s demonstrated that even though he’s introverted, he can speak eloquently at work. And, he’s done such an impressive job, his boss invites him to chair a series of future talks.
He may be a lil fictionalized man, but aren’t you proud of Mr. B?!
I’m even prouder of Mr. B than I am of Mr. A!

What does this mean for us?

It means there’s HOPE!

Be the HEROIC Rat you’ve always known you can be!
We can be our own hero!
We can remind ourselves that it’s extremely important for us to do whatever we can to change our psychological response to any outside stressor.
The next time we’re the ones giving a presentation…
Or asking someone out…
Or putting ourselves out there, to showcase our latest artwork…
No matter the scenario, we can completely change the dynamic in our minds and bodies when we reframe our interpretation.
We can remind ourselves:

It’s not what’s happening to us…

It’s what’s happening FOR US.

And we can do it, no matter how big or small the potential stressor might be.
Let’s try it this week, the next time we’re stuck in traffic.
Instead of allowing ourselves to be so pissed off by all the cars around us, wondering why people are slow to move when the light turns green or the turn signal changes, we can control our emotional, psychological reaction by doing things like listening to audiobooks to pass the time.

All in all, our stress-induced suffering depends on the STORY we’re telling ourselves about it.

So, let’s make sure it’s the best story we can tell, no matter the situation.
The Say-NO-to-Stress Storyteller in me honors & respects the Say-NO-to-Stress Storyteller in each of you,
Marisa

If you would like to hear or see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, and you’d love to learn about the science of self-improvement, please Subscribe to my new YouTube Channel and signup for my free Substack Newsletter.

Together, we’ll explore all the ways that we can 10x our life — mind, body, & soul.

We’ll learn the scientific, physiological, and psychological reasons why we are the way that we are, and combine that understanding with simple, active practices that will:

• Enliven our emotions & creativity;

• Enhance our efficiency & productivity;

• Foster a greater depth of Self;

• Build the Secure Attachment that we need to develop a Growth Mindset; and,

• Reprogram our minds to pivot from the Sympathetic Nervous System to the Parasympathetic Nervous System when we need it to, more often than not.

I’ve planned so many exciting & fun things to share with you (in addition to music!) and I can’t wait for you to get all the FREE goodies I’ve prepared for you.

We CAN do this, TOGETHER!

Marisa

 

Are you serious about self-improvement
& want to have unstoppable self-belief?
Then SUBSCRIBE TO MY FREE SUBSTACK and entrain your brain the quick & easy way, with my daily Mindset & Meditation (M&M) practice. To learn how, click this link.
Every day, I write & share 1 handwritten M&M if you want to grow with me.

 

In addition, new Chapters for my serialized science fiction series (THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES) are released every weekend on Substack. Substack Subscribers can read the 1st Book in the series for FREE! Just click here to opt-in + receive my Fiction writing!

Attorney, Artist, and Author of THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES. Writer who believes in the power of words. Life-long learner who’s passionate about the science and art of self-improvement. 

Join me, as we explore the science and skills behind VICTUS, the path and practice that can silence our inner critic and free us to be our truest, authentic self. 

Want to Live a Happier Life, Filled with Synergy, Flow, and Freedom in Everything You Do? 

Then Sign-Up for The VICTUS Method Newsletter @ my Contact Page.

You DON’T have low self-esteem!

Posted on by marisavictus

SUBSCRIBE to my Free Substack, linked below.

Every day, I share 1 FREE M&M (Mindset & Meditation) Post to build Unstoppable Self-Belief.

You tell me, “I have low self-esteem.”
I say, “NOPE!”
You give me the stink eye and probably want to cuss me out. You think, What does Marisa know about me anyway?! We’re strangers. She doesn’t know what I go through, mentally or emotionally.
I nod my head as if I know what you must be thinking, and admit, “I don’t know you. I don’t know what you think when you’re down on yourself. But,” I say, quite confidently, “I’d bet a million dollars you’re just like me…and we all suffer from the false belief that we’ve got a pretty good memory.”
You balk at this, too. You do think you have a good memory.
You tell me, “If I’d planned to make dinner tonight, I’d be able to go to the grocery store and get everything I needed for one of my go-to recipes. No need for a grocery list. My memory’s reliable.”
“Sure, sure,” I agree. “But that’s when your emotions aren’t running high. That’s not when you’re feeling fearful or anxious. And again, I’d be willing to bet, that whenever you’ve felt bad about yourself, whenever you’ve felt like you have low self-esteem, it’s not actually true.”

You don’t suffer from Low Self-Esteem. You’ve simply forgotten who you are.

Just think about it.
Let’s say you’re about to go to a party. There will be people there you do not know.
All of a sudden, your palms start to sweat. You imagine saying Hello and choking up.
You picture yourself needing some liquid courage to get the words out.
You’re reminded of those times that you were excluded back in grade school.
Then you start telling yourself a story — maybe it’s your longtime Limiting Belief that says, I have capital S, capital A, “Social Anxiety.”
Now you’ve only got about an hour until you have to leave for this party, and you’re coming up with excuses for how you’re going to get out of it.
Would that serve you?
Of course not.
Not only will you be telling your brain that there really is something wrong with you, you will be subconsciously reinforcing the belief that you suffer from a serious mental impairment.
If you do skip the party, you will absolutely keep your comfort zone small. You will never grow beyond that, and the next time you’re invited to a party, you’re going to be just as afraid to go, if not more so.
But what if all of this is completely avoidable?
What if a simple Mindset Reset could solve it all?
What if you didn’t need any liquid courage to get you from point A to point B, from holing up at home, to driving over to that party?

Tell yourself the TRUTH: You do not have low self-esteem! You simply have AMNESIA!

The truth is, you do not have social anxiety.
Unless you have seen a psychiatrist and been formally diagnosed with a severe chronic fear that is debilitating, you do not have “social anxiety,” so stop telling yourself that!
The story you need to tell yourself is clear and simple:
The truth is, you simply need to develop ACCURATE self-esteem.
How do we define “self-esteem”?
Self-Esteem is what we think about ourselves.
But — to be ACCURATE — we need to have a clear assessment of who we actually are.
We need to see and actually remember our strengths when we need to. Not only when we’re already in a positive mood, but especially when we’re afraid and fearful, when our nervous system is dysregulated.
Does that mean that we need to artificially inflate our egos?
No.
In this example, having positive self-esteem doesn’t mean you believe you’re going to enter the room like some movie star or Mr. 007, all suave, like everyone’s going to be hanging on your every word at this party. No, you don’t have to take it that far, obviously.
But, you do need to force yourself to make an accurate self-assessment.
No matter who you are, no matter what level of anxiety you may feel in social situations, there has to have been at least a handful of times in your life when you felt comfortable among other people.
Maybe it was with your family. Or your best friend.
Times when you might have been able to tell stories that were entertaining.
When you got other people to laugh.
When you got other people to smile.
When you supported other people and were a great listener.
These are all instances that you need to force yourself to remember when you’re feeling afraid.

Build Your Arsenal of Accurate Self-Esteem!

The easiest way to do that is to stop telling yourself a false story, and to start collecting evidence.
Simply think of at least five times in the past that you have succeeded socially.
Remind yourself that you have the capability to do it again.
Then get yourself to that party.
And just be open to seeing where it might lead.
Even if you utter only a few words, or say hi to just a few people before you leave, that’s still better than sitting around at home and expecting yourself to get better by keeping your comfort zone small.
When you go to that party and you have even the smallest positive reaction — maybe it’s just a simple smile — that is a WIN.
That is evidence that you can use to Build Your Arsenal of Positive Self-Belief and actively change the false narrative, the false story, that you are telling yourself about yourself.

Apply the same process, no matter the scenario.

The next time you think, Oh I feel so bad about myself, and you sense that horrible feeling of low self-esteem, STOP it immediately.
Use the Mindset & Meditation (M&M) practice that I explained in this separate post, and apply it to this M&M that I wrote (handwritten, just for you):

Every time I am down on myself,

I give myself a reality check:

I list five things I am good at.

I remember my strengths.

I see who I actually am, and who I choose to be:

A person who protects my Positive Mindset.

A person who maintains Accurate Self-Esteem.


And commit to this M&M practice.
Every single time you are down on yourself, give yourself a reality check.
List five things you are good at.
Remember your strengths.
Remember who you actually are, and who you choose to be:
Tell yourself,
I am a person who protects my positive mindset.
I am a person who maintains accurate self-esteem.
Then repeat, repeat, repeat, until it’s second nature and you don’t feel the need to repeat it anymore.

It’s that simple.

You don’t need to over complicate it.
You CAN coach yourself to success.
All it takes is repetition to develop Accurate Self-Esteem.

The Coach inside of me honors & respects the Coach in each of you,

Marisa

If you would like to hear or see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, and you’d love to learn about the science of self-improvement, please Subscribe to my new YouTube Channel and signup for my free Substack Newsletter.

Together, we’ll explore all the ways that we can 10x our life — mind, body, & soul.

We’ll learn the scientific, physiological, and psychological reasons why we are the way that we are, and combine that understanding with simple, active practices that will:

• Enliven our emotions & creativity;

• Enhance our efficiency & productivity;

• Foster a greater depth of Self;

• Build the Secure Attachment that we need to develop a Growth Mindset; and,

• Reprogram our minds to pivot from the Sympathetic Nervous System to the Parasympathetic Nervous System when we need it to, more often than not.

I’ve planned so many exciting & fun things to share with you (in addition to music!) and I can’t wait for you to get all the FREE goodies I’ve prepared for you.

We CAN do this, TOGETHER!

Marisa

 

Are you serious about self-improvement
& want to have unstoppable self-belief?
Then SUBSCRIBE TO MY FREE SUBSTACK and entrain your brain the quick & easy way, with my daily Mindset & Meditation (M&M) practice. To learn how, click this link.
Every day, I write & share 1 handwritten M&M if you want to grow with me.

 

In addition, new Chapters for my serialized science fiction series (THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES) are released every weekend on Substack. Substack Subscribers can read the 1st Book in the series for FREE! Just click here to opt-in + receive my Fiction writing!

Attorney, Artist, and Author of THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES. Writer who believes in the power of words. Life-long learner who’s passionate about the science and art of self-improvement. 

Join me, as we explore the science and skills behind VICTUS, the path and practice that can silence our inner critic and free us to be our truest, authentic self. 

Want to Live a Happier Life, Filled with Synergy, Flow, and Freedom in Everything You Do? 

Then Sign-Up for The VICTUS Method Newsletter @ my Contact Page.

Vanquish the Nightmare

Posted on by marisavictus

Vanquish the Nightmare

Awaken the Superhero in You

The clock strikes 6 and your alarm assaults your ears.
You got an extra hour of sleep (the only silver lining you can see to the annual falling back of time, when Daylight Savings ends). But, it’s not enough to make up for the bad dream you’d been having.
You can still picture the nightmare: Your white-knuckling the syllabus in your hand. You can’t find your way to the class you’ve been assigned to. And the bell’s ringing. First Period’s starting.
And you’re naked.
Of course.
You force yourself up out of bed and wipe away the sleep from your eyes, wishing you can wipe away the dread you’d felt just moments ago, trapped in your recurring dream.
You could let this nightmare persist. You could let it impact your day. You could tell yourself to call off from work, and take a “Mental Health Day.”
Or, you could…

Take Control of Your Mindset

Is there anyone on our big beautiful Earth who hasn’t had this experience?
Nope.
All of us have been there. You go to bed thinking all’s well. Maybe you even read something hopeful the night before. Or watched a comedy that’d put you in a great mood.
You could’ve been the type to lay out your workout clothes, too. Yup. You’re a Go-Getter who already prepped your running shoes.
Everything should’ve been great when — BAM!
The nightmare from Hell sends your entire body out of whack.
You feel terrible now. The stress hormone, cortisol, has flooded your veins. You have a headache. And you don’t want to do anything, much less go for a run.
Hardly a person would blame you for taking it easy. For skipping the run.
I’m here to tell you what I’ve done to take back control: the EXACT OPPOSITE.

When your mood’s derailed, it’s more important than ever to STICK TO YOUR ROUTINE!

Here’s 4 reasons why:

1. Exercise Boosts Your Mood

No matter what you’d planned to do (whether the jog was part of your original plan or not), you must do everything in your power to elevate your mood.
Exercise does that. The rush of endorphins will automatically counteract the cortisol in your veins.
So, play the tunes you love the most. And get moving! FAST!
If you’re anything like me, it’ll only take 5 minutes — TOPS — and you’ll be feeling a million times better.
You can focus on the physical exertion and the music, and that dream will dissipate from your short term memory.
2. You Can’t Trust Your Brain: Bad Feelings Can Cloud Your Judgment
Are you serious about achieving your Goals?
Then don’t let some bad feelings cloud your thinking.
No matter what’s happening in our lives, our lives will never be perfect.
We might be killin’ it in one area, and barely surviving in the next.
So, don’t let your emotions sway you from taking the actions you need to take to achieve what you’ve set out to do.
Whenever bad feelings arise, trust that they’ll pass.
Then remind yourself: you KNOW what to do —
Now, DO IT!

3. Your Actions Are PROOF that YOU Are IN Control

Your brain is ALWAYS listening, ALWAYS watching your every move.
You say, “I care”?
You say, “I want this?”
You say, “I’ll do that?”
Well, your brain’s always paying attention to whether or not you actually FOLLOW THROUGH.
And, when your actions are inconsistent with what you’ve said, your brain knows on a subconscious level that you don’t really mean it.
Which boosts the likelihood you won’t do it the next time you need to.
But when your ACTIONS ARE CONSISTENT with your words?
Well, then, your brain sees that YOU are its Master. YOU are in control.
No matter how you feel, your brain trusts that you will do what has to be done.
And the neural program that reinforces that positive behavior-emotion-loop will strengthen, and be more likely to repeat, the next time that bad dream comes around.

4. You learn to TRUST Yourself

The more you take the right Action regardless of your emotional state, the more you will learn to trust yourself.
You got over the nightmare this morning.
You know you can get over it again.
And, before long, that nightmare will stop recurring.
You’ll be standing there nekkid when, suddenly, you’ll remember, That’s right…I’m naked ‘cause I’m changing.
You look down at your hands, and there you see it: your bright red, Superhero cape.
The Superhero in me honors & respects the Superhero in each of you,
Marisa

If you love to learn about the science of self-improvement, please Subscribe to my YouTube Channel and signup for my free Substack Newsletter.

Together, we’ll explore all the ways that we can 10x our life — mind, body, & soul.

We’ll learn the scientific, physiological, and psychological reasons why we are the way that we are, and combine that understanding with simple, active practices that will:

• Enliven our emotions & creativity;

• Enhance our efficiency & productivity;

• Foster a greater depth of Self;

• Build the Secure Attachment that we need to develop a Growth Mindset; and,

• Reprogram our minds to pivot from the Sympathetic Nervous System to the Parasympathetic Nervous System when we need it to, more often than not.

I’ve planned so many exciting & fun things to share with you (in addition to music!) and I can’t wait for you to get all the FREE goodies I’ve prepared for you.

We CAN do this, TOGETHER!

Are you serious about self-improvement & want to have unstoppable self-belief?

Then SUBSCRIBE TO MY FREE SUBSTACK and entrain your brain the quick & easy way, with my daily Mindset & Meditation (M&M) practice.

Every day, I write & share 1 handwritten M&M in my “Notes” if you want to grow with me.

To learn how, click this link.

In addition, new Chapters for my serialized science fiction series (THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES) are released every weekend, and Subscribers can read the 1st Book in the series for FREE! Just click here (or visit https://marisavictus.substack.com/account) to opt-in + receive my Fiction writing!

Marisa

Attorney, Artist, and Author of THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES. Writer who believes in the power of words. Life-long learner who’s passionate about the science and art of self-improvement. 

Join me, as we explore the science and skills behind VICTUS, the path and practice that can silence our inner critic and free us to be our truest, authentic self. 

Want to Live a Happier Life, Filled with Synergy, Flow, and Freedom in Everything You Do? 

Then Sign-Up for The VICTUS Method Newsletter @ my Contact Page.