🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) in our private Skool community every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
Chapter 11’s all about what you can do — 🤔 When You Can’t Find Motivation: Tapping Into Energy & Flow.
Speaking of Tapping into Energy & Flow…
Now’s the perfect time to do precisely that, by getting in-tune with our SPOOKY Intuition!
How? By taking our cue from Sally, from The Nightmare Before Christmas, of course!
No one else listened to their intuition quite like Sally, who realized early on that her beau, Jack Skellington, was about to make a massive mistake trying to be someone he’s not (Santa Claus) by transforming himself into Santi Claws…to much mayhem & mischief!
The film’s got it all: awesome old-school claymation, spooky but catchy music, and tons of heart, which is why I say it’s the greatest Halloween film of all time!
So, in honor of my love for all things Halloween, here’s some of my own old school art to celebrate The Nightmare Before Christmas 👆
🙌Want to make likeminded friends? That’s precisely why I started my FREE Private Skool Community: The Mindful VICTUS Playscape to build a supportive & safe community for Creatives to BREAK FREE from our F.E.A.R.s, one by one, to become the MVPs of our Creative Life!
📚🎉📚
For a Limited Time only — you can download the
1st Book of The Obsidian Chronicles
(OBSIDIAN: Birth to Venus)
to read in the Kindle App or your preferred .epub Reader!
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
Chapter 10 — 🤔 When You Can’t Find Motivation — Tapping Into Energy & Flow.
Do you believe there’s Power in SOFTENING?
What do you usually do when you don’t feel motivated?
OPTION #1: Are you the type of person who transforms into David Goggins, the former NAVY Seal known for calling himself a piece of shit, to motivate himself to get shit done?
Or,
OPTION #2: Do you take a softer approach, like the Mother we all wish we had: the nurturing presence that doesn’t berate you, but comes close to you instead, to give you a cuddle, listen to your doubts and worries, wipe away your tears, and reinforce what you want to believe about yourself — that you just can’t do something yet — and that, deep down, you are worthy, you are cherished, you are capable, and you can do anything you set your mind to?
Take a Mindful Moment to Ask Yourself to Get REAL.
Be HONEST.
⭐️ Which Motivator do you tend to call when the going gets rough, when you fail to meet expectations — whether they’re others’ expectations or your own?
⭐️ When you look at your list of To Do’s and you can’t seem to find the motivation to do what you need to do…
🤔 Does your Inner Critic bomb you like David Goggins, all crazy-eyed & spewing hateful epithets?
Or,
🤔 Does your Inner Child call for your Inner Mother (the Nurturing Force inside all of us) — if you’d only be willing to get quiet, go inward, and listen to the intuitive feelings that are whispering in your heart?
We all know the latter is what the “RIGHT” Answer is supposed to be.
Problem is, we suffer from a problem that the Ortners call…
The Motivation Paradox:
The more you need [Motivation], the less you have it.
The more you chase it, the faster it runs.
The more you beat yourself up about not having it,
the deeper it burrows into hiding.
My MINDFUL Reflection:
My Personal Pattern
I am a highly productive person.
I’m NOT saying this to brag.
I’m saying this because I’ve worked DAMNED hard to make myself be this way.
And I work my ass off everyday to MAKE myself continue being this way.
But, before you click out of this Post because I seem too annoying to keep reading, DON’T!
The whole reason why I’m saying all this is:
In every book I choose for the BOOK CLUB in my STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT☕️🍵 , there’s always a chapter that makes me say to myself, “YES! This is The One — the one chapter that made buying this book worth it! “
I used to think THAT Ch. 8 was The One chapter for me.
Well, erase that!
THIS Chapter 10 is THE Chapter! This is “The One”!
I find this quite amusing.
Because, judging from the Title — When You Can’t Find Motivation — I thought “Psh! I don’t need this Chapter!” because I’m so motivated to do a LOT to be productive…All. The. Time!
You know why I was so very wrong?!
The more I reflected upon Chapter 10, the more I came to the realization that, for most of my life, I was in a chronic state of stress.
Because my motivation to be so productive comes from PAIN. From SUFFERING. From the STRESS of wanting to do whatever I can to avoid current or future pain & suffering.
And, sadly, that is the level of emotional, mental, and physical (frequent migraines) pain & suffering that continually motivates me to be so productive. To avoid repeating that. To save myself in the ways I know how, with Positive Self-Talk to rewire my predominantly Left-hemisphere-loving brain, that’s fond of using the logic and language I’m used to leaning on as an Attorney, with practices like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Journaling.
But, ever since I started to build upon my practice as a lifelong Meditator & fitness fan, by adding Yoga and breath-work to my weekly repertoire, I’ve come to realize how powerful somatic practices are because they focus on going inward, bypassing words to sense the body instead, and calm the nervous system that way.
Then, we did our deep-dive into works like Martha Beck’s Book, BEYOND ANXIETY: Curiosity, Creativity, and Finding Your Life’s Purpose by Martha Beck, and we learned how leaning into the Right-hemisphere of our brain — where Creativity and Wordlessness reigns supreme — can pull us out of the Anxiety Spirals our brains and bodies are trapped inside.
Bridging these experiences together made me realize that my healing transformation is mainly attributed to regulating my body, because that’s what regulates the nervous system most.
And, the more I’ve focused on somatic and creative practices first, the less I struggle to apply CBT second.
When my body’s calm, my Inner Critic quiets down and eventually leaves. I can apply the logical reasoning that my Left-hemisphere loves, without having to fight my own worst enemy. With words that are based in reality, not F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real).
What’s even more astounding?
Something magical happens to the words you think & speak into existence when you’re thinking & speaking them whileyou SIMULTANEOUSLY tap on the meridian points with EFT Tapping:
It’s like you get the ABSOLUTE best of BOTH WORLDS:
The logical, rational Left hemisphere of your brain softens and lets go of the Anxiety Spiral, until your amygdala calms down; your breathing steadies; and your Parasympathetic Nervous System takes the reigns without your having to force anything.
And, like a magic spell, the positive words and feelings and images (the CBT) you think and speak into existence…when you are ready & willing to, without any rushing whatsoever…gently entrains your brain with all the Creative Power that the Right hemisphere of your brain can envision in your mind’s eye.
It sounds like something that would take a long time, but it doesn’t. At least, for me, it feels like being reborn, from the wisest, Highest Self — the Inner Mother — that’s inside of you, from the nurturing spirit that knows best what your Inner Child needs to feel heard, understood, and loved.
In essence, EFT allows me to blend the Attorney in me with the Creative in me… like no other somatic practice can.
For me, Chapter 10’s life-changing because it explains why.
I can’t help it — I want to know and understand the science behind why something works, and Chapter 10 explains the science-based, physiological reasons why it’s not healthy (physiologically) to skip doing the somatic practice first.
As the Ortners explain, stress screws up everything:
The Dopamine Drought: You’re motivated by your brain’s reward system, which runs on dopamine, but stress blocks your dopamine receptors.
The Prefrontal Shutdown: Under stress, blood flow diverts away from your prefrontal cortex (your brain’s CEO) to your survival centers. You lose access to the part of your brain that knows how to plan, prioritize, and take action.
The Norepinephrine Paradox: Chronic stress triggers norepinephrine until your receptors become so resistant norepinephrine stops getting you to “go” anymore.
The Mitochondrial Mutiny: Stress can lower the productivity of your mitochondria, the power plants that produce energy in our cells, by up to 50 percent.
The GABA Blockade: What should help your brain feel calm and focused — GABA (gamma-aminobutyric acid) — is depleted, which makes you feel anxious & antsy.
Now it all makes sense. I was stuck in a chronic state of stress. And, sometimes, no matter how hard you try to reason your way out of it, your body needs help to regulate.
Now, EFT’s The One I go to first, because it beats my Inner Critic, every time.
Where CBT can feel like a battle of wits that can easily fall sway to my Inner Critic’s seemingly logical arguments, EFT knocks CBT down, from first place to second place.
With EFT, I get to rewire my brain and body with SOFTNESS.
Without sparring against my Inner Critic.
And after I’ve anchored my dis-ease with a brief setup statement, I get to use Wordlessness, to simply be with that dis-ease as I tap on the meridian points.
It takes hardly any time at all for me to tap on the acupressure points and, interestingly, I feel the pressure releasing from my body, mostly during the period without words!
For someone who spends a significant portion of my life writing and speaking, that makes the Attorney & Creative Writer in me drop my jaw in astounding disbelief!
Yet, the results are undeniable:
When I finish a round of tapping and take the time to give myself a new numbered rating for my “Subjective Unit of Distress,” I can literally see my SUD numbers decline the more rounds that I do, the more I relax into the negative, and slowly embrace the positive, as I go through the VICTUS Method to THINK•DO•&•BE:
THINK with EFT;
RE-THINK with CBT; and,
The more my DO is EFT,
The more I realize I’m able to stay — to BE — in a relaxed, peaceful, & well-regulated state, no matter what is going on around me.
Ultimately, I’ve transformed how I motivate myself, from Option #1 to Option #2.
YES, this Chapter’s The One for me, because it’s made it so very clear to me that you can SOFTEN to motivate yourself. Without the struggle. Without the stress.
Do YOU need to be the Drill Sergeant to find Motivation?
Or, are YOU willing to SOFTEN, to tap your body to Motivation, instead?
🤔 When you give EFT Tapping a try, do you find it easier to THINK & RE-THINK?
🤔 Do you find it’s easier to DO what needs to be done, when you calm your body with somatic EFT first?
🤔 Despite the ups and downs of life, regardless of external circumstances, do you enjoy a more peaceful, longer-lasting baseline, a steadier, healthier state in which to live, a more blissful way to BE?
🤔 Are you ready to practice SOFTENING with me?
⭐️ Instead of trying harder, why don’t we practice trusting our bodies to relax into Motivation, by doing EFT more?
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
🤔 What if SOFTENING Helps Us to Sail Away from Trauma?
Chapter 9 — 🤔 When the Past Won’t Stay in the Past: Healing Old Wounds That Still Hurt.
Do you believe in Synchronicity?
That the Universe is sending you precisely what you need to encounter at exactly the right time?
Whether they’re positive or negative, experiences are coming your way, at exactly the time that is meant for you?
Growing up, I never believed in Synchronicity.
Things happened and — depending on my Mindset — it would transform into a learning opportunity that would benefit me (a Growth Mindset)…
Or, it could become entrenched in my psyche, as a long-term hinderance (a Limiting Belief) that would make me take (or not take) actions that would prevent me from moving forward.
Over time, I realized I was the Captain of my Own Ship; the winds of life could blow me this way or that, but I had the personal power to use my own Inner Compass, to decide the direction I wanted to go, the destination I wanted to visit, and how I would travel there. No matter where I went, I came to realize I got to decide which sails to hoist, how to maneuver my rudder, and how fast or slow I wanted to go, to alter my speed.
Most times, I felt a modicum of control over these decisions.
But, as life happens for everyone, sometimes we can’t avoid a storm.
We plan an itinerary — like the 4-week foray into music that we just wrapped up — and, for the most part, we enjoy the ride, with hopefully most of the expected highs. But, there are also unexpected lows that no amount of preparation can prevent us from encountering.
Throughout the journey, EFT Tapping’s been a wonderful guide, like a Timeless Map charting my Past, Present, and Future.
The EFT Setup Statement — “Even though I feel X, I completely love and accept myself”— grounds me in the present moment. It invites me to determine what I am feeling, right now.
Now, take a Mindful Minute, to ask yourself:
⭐️ Think of a Past Trauma or recent hardship.
⭐️ Imagine yourself opening a Timeless Map, charting your own Past, Present, and Future.
⭐️Now ask yourself:
Am I aimed at my North Star?
Do I feel anxious, nervous, negative — or excited?
Do I remember feeling the same way, sometime in the past?
What was the experience then?
Looking back, was it a blessing?
What was the meaning I gave it, at the time? What about now?
Did I keep going in that direction? Or, did I change course?
What regrets — if any — do I have?
Like a Timeless Map in my pocket, EFT’s helped me to trust that — even if my Inner Compass took me into uncharted territory, and the seas got rough — I’d have EFT to guide me, to help me get back on course.
Not because I never made any mistakes. Or fell prey to any pitfalls.
But precisely because I’d made many mistakes and escaped. Not unscathed. But wiser, because of the lessons I had learned.
Yes, with the tool of EFT Tapping in my arsenal, I thought I was ready to overcome my F.E.A.R. that it was “too late” to return to my love of music.
So, I invited you to go on this 4-week music journey with me, with the map of EFT Tapping in our collective pocket, to navigate us on this Maiden Voyage.
To bridge the divide, between my individual Self and the community of Creatives we’re building:
Not because we have all the answers.
But because we have the desire to find them & heal. Together.
YES, I wanted us to go off on a grand adventure!
And you can tell, based on the 4 challenges I chose for each week, that I knew EFT Tapping would come in handy, because I planned an itinerary that was daunting, emotionally:
Battling Stage Fright
Overcoming Perfectionism
Abandoning The Mask
Practicing EFT for Vulnerability
If you traveled alongside me, we each did EFT Tapping, individually, by ourselves.
And we strengthened our ability to experience what it’s like to truly feel safe in our bodies, minds, and spirit…
But, the Universe turned out to have more Synchronicity planned than that.
The Universe did not disappoint!
It put numerous lessons (obstacles) directly in my path.
Here’s the ugly truth — the Captain’s Log, if you will. Read it.
Then decide if you’re willing to go on your own Voyage, to explore the Great Unknown on your own Creative Sea.
My MINDFUL Reflection:
BEFORE
In many ways, going into September, I was feeling fantastic about my Creative Journey.
Because this was our Maiden Voyage for exploring EFT Tapping to Music, but it was far from my first time venturing away from shore.
After so many years, it felt amazing to be showing my true Creative Self and finally be accepted for that.
I think that that’s what gave me the courage to heal the Inner Child in me that regretted quitting piano when I was young.
After all, I’d healed the Creative Writer in me with the help and support of my new supportive friends and family.
So, I thought, why not use this opportunity, this momentum, to try to heal the Musician inside of me, too?
And what synergy and synchronicity! The timing looked perfect because the Ortners’ REWIRED book happened to land on Chapter 8, that was focused on Overcoming Fear.
So I dove into this 4-week experiment, head-first, thinking it would be fun and I could drop my mask even further — to move away from the always-polished, left-brained Attorney that I often feel I have to be to help my clients.
Would it be possible,I wondered, to let go of that sense of obligatory perfectionism?
Would I be able to create videos and music that allowed me to experience Joy, Flow, and a lightheartedness that’s far from the Professional suit that I felt the legal profession often requires?
Could I move away from the regimented confines of the law?
Could I embrace the right-hemisphere of my brain, to explore Creative work that’s led by my intuition, not a rigid sense of rules?
Would music allow me to quiet my logical, rational mind to embrace lyrics, poetry, expression, and artistry embodied in emotional and musical freedom?
These were all things that I hoped to discover on our Maiden Voyage into EFT Tapping with Music.
And I knew EFT Tapping would be necessary, because the itinerary I planned promised turbulent seas:
1. Battling Stage Fright
Buoyed by the fantastic freedom I experienced in my Creative Writing — and in a large part because of my wonderful circle of friends who were there to support me this time, unlike the many times I was rejected in the past — I felt emboldened to push myself out of my comfort zone to overcome my stage fright and post the 1st Video of my music series, to show my playing piano in public for the first time since I was in grade school.
2. Overcoming Perfectionism
In the second week, I published an audio recording of my singing the lyrics for the same song which I had chosen specifically because of its healing title and message: “I Love You Always, Forever.” As an ode to my Inner Child. And in the hope that my sharing this message would allow me to meet like-minded people, who also wished to heal their Inner Child.
I invited my readers to imagine what might be possible for all of us if we were able to tap into the power of this music; to feel empowered by the song’s message; to be able to serenade ourselves with its lyrics and actually mean it, wholeheartedly?
This is a question I often ask myself because I know how I can have love and compassion toward myself, and I also know all too well how incredibly harsh and mean my Inner Critic can be to me. If I could have the capacity to feel such a drastic difference singing these words, to this happy and hopeful beat, I anticipated many other people might experience something similar.
And I wanted to encourage this kind of somatic healing, that utilizes all of our senses: in words, in stories, in lyrics, in music, in the physical sensation of our singing, dancing, and deep-breathing that music can do, uniquely well.
This was the spirit with which I began this journey.
DURING: Control vs. Letting Go
I have to admit, this was a hard journey for me.
The emotions that I felt are like a roller coaster.
When it comes to the music itself, I now feel attuned to a part of me that has been silent for a very long time.
I really enjoyed practicing the piano and I enjoyed singing along as I practiced.
And, while it was hard to record myself playing at the beginning, especially when I had to listen to myself and see myself like an outsider looking in, with all of the mistakes and fumbling that necessarily happens when you’re trying to re-teach yourself an instrument you haven’t played with any teachers or instruction for years…
Eventually, after making enough recordings, I felt better because I was able to see that my playing was slowly improving.
There was an obvious difference between when I started and where I ended from week to week.
But, by the end of Week #2, I wasn’t quite ready to post a video of my piano playing at the same time as I sang. So I tabled that for the time being, and satisfied myself with singing and sharing a Recording of just my voice, singing without the piano.
It was my way to be gentle with myself, to soften, as I have been trying to do with my EFT Tapping practice: to acknowledge how I’m feeling and say, “Even though I feel X, I completely love and accept myself,” which, in this case, meant I was reminding myself, “I don’t rush myself before I’m ready.”
It’s one of the ways I tried to be kind to myself.
But, on the flip side, I also admit it was one of the ways I tried to maintain some semblance of control, as I tried to overcome my fear from week to week.
Isn’t that so human?
This tendency that we all have to try to protect ourselves from the pain that can come with completely letting go of any expectation or outcome.
I think, overall, I was successful, at least with regard to letting go of the stage fright (a little)…
3. Abandoning The Mask
I found it so freeing to show more of my true unpolished Self without the mask, by posting my Video singing karaoke, to celebrate September, let go, & let loose for Week #3.
🔮 Side of Hand: Today, I’m tapping to reconnect with the Inner Child in me.
🔮 Top of Head: Even though it’s been a long time…
🔮 Eyebrow: I remember you.
🔮 Side of Eye: I see you.
🔮 Under Eye: I picture you.
🔮 Under Nose: I feel you.
🔮 Under Mouth: Even though it’s been a long time since I’ve given you a voice, I completely love & cherish you.
🔮 Collarbone: I carry you with me.
🔮 Under Arm: For always…
Repeat as many rounds as you like, and add a description that’s specific to you. Like, “I remember how you loved to sing and dance along to the radio.”
AFTER
On balance, we could say our 4-week Maiden Voyage was a success.
I did what I’d set out to do.
But, here’s the ugly truth:
We had a Stowaway: Past Trauma.
And there was no controlling that.
Even though I was the Captain.
Even though I planned the itinerary.
Even though I was ready for the storms I knew would come my way.
I was not prepared for the loss of Subscribers that followed!
YUP, this is how Past Trauma can be triggered by Present Circumstances.
I mean, I know a lot of people probably subscribe to my Substack because of my Book Club, where I do a deep dive into every single chapter of the books that I’ve selected for my ☕️STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT☕️ that I host here on Substack.
I had anticipated the potential for people to maybe tune out during my 4-week experiment with music.
I even tried to lessen that likelihood by at least letting my readers know that this was something I was planning for just a 4-week period, in the hope that they’d know I intended to give them the same or, hopefully, better value after the 4-week journey ended.
But man, seeing people Unsubscribe, was painful!
Was it related to my Music experiment?
Or, did they just want to clean up their Substack subscriptions list?
I don’t know.
And I’ll never know.
Because I won’t ask anyone for their reason why; I simply trust that the right people will stay because those are the people who are meant for me.
But — wow! — my Monkey Mind immediately had an insane amount of thoughts like, “Damn! I must really suck at playing piano and singing for people to abandon ship this way!
And I am only human. It hurt to see the number of Subscribers that I have start ticking down.
Which is precisely why I am sharing it so vulnerably in this Post.
Because I value authenticity & believe in the power of “being real.”
I don’t want fake friendships.
And I’m devoted to building authentic relationships in my community, both in real life and virtually, on my Substack, YouTube, Instagram, and Skool.
Plus, now’s the perfect time to “be real” because Chapter 9 is focused on Past Trauma, and I’d be lying if I said that these Unsubscribes did not remind me of the rejection my Creative Self suffered in the past.
That’s why I’m sharing the true story — the good and the bad parts — of this journey I’m on, to find and honor my Creative Self:
It is not for the faint of heart!
There is a tremendous amount of self-doubt and fear when allowing one’s True Self to be seen.
And pain when it seems like you are finally showing your True Self and people who had previously subscribed to you unsubscribe.
It is a level of pain that I imagine early humans must have felt, not only emotionally but physically in their bodies when threatened with the loss of their tribe.
Thousands of years later, we feel the exact same pain echoed even now, in our time of ever-present “connection” through technology.
Yep, every Unsubscribe was a stab to my digital heart.
Not because it my F.E.A.R. is actually true.
But because my Monkey Mind hijacked my brain and body, and it kept telling me that my F.E.A.R. is true.
Remember: The Captain’s In Charge
When the Monkey’s escaped, it’s time for my Captain to take charge.
My Highest Self goes inward, gets curious, and practices what I like to call The VICTUS Method: to THINK•DO•&•BE what we need to THINK•DO•&•BE, to be the Authentic Self we choose to be.
I put the Monkey back in its cage, give it a banana, and, while it’s busy munching, I pull open my Timeless EFT Tapping Map.
While tapping, I THINK.I take the time to slow down. To soften. To reflect on why exactly the Unsubscribes hurt.
I come to the conclusion:
Unsubscribes hurt because they evoke a feeling of separation in me.
That’s what feels painful, I thought, You no longer feel connected to others.
I look at my Timeless EFT Tapping Map, and see the path I took on prior journeys:
When I dealt with pain or disappointment in the past, I’d often go straight to the Left-Hemisphere of my brain, to RE-THINK with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).
I’d counter the F.E.A.R. I’d ask myself questions, like, “Is that really true?”
But now I notice, I’m taking a longer pause, to DO a somatic practice instead. It might be yoga or breath work or meditation; but, in this case, the somatic practice I chose was EFT.
I tapped on the meridian points, while telling myself, “Even though I feel self-doubt, fear, and pain from these Unsubscribes, I can truly love and accept myself.”
And I quickly noticed something interesting:
Since I started applying EFT Tapping to my practice, many months ago, I’ve come a very long way.
From saying — but not believing — the part, “I can truly love and accept myself,” to suddenly recognizing, “I can truly love and accept myself.”
And, the more I’ve acknowledged the dis-ease I’ve felt in my body as each of the negative thoughts popped up, followed by the statement, “I can truly love and accept myself,” the more I sensed the more rigid, logical left-hemisphere of my brain relaxing.
Followed by this wonderful feeling of expansion.
I could literally feel myself adopting a more open-mind.
That’s when I knew: I’m ready to RE-THINKwith CBT:
Even though my Monkey Mind wanted me to believe the F.E.A.R. that Unsubscribes meant a negative separation…
That wasn’t true.
In reality, I started to believe, I was not being separated from what is negative…
Until I felt a shift in my body, based on the belief:
I am being protected from what’s not aligned with me.
Yes, the more I tapped, the more I was sure, The right people will come.And I am still connected to everyone else who has continued to stay Subscribed to me.
I’m connected to every single person who Subscribes and resonates with the message of healing that I’m trying to share on this Creative Journey.
I was starting to feel better, but — as is most often the case — healing doesn’t happen in a straight line, from despair to joy.
It takes two steps forward and three steps back.
Trauma cycles.
Days passed.
When I kept feeling ugh.
The pangs kept coming, periodically, like the Monkey got hold of a metal cup and was clanging the bars every once and a while.
So, I showed up for myself.
I kept reminding myself of the VICTUS Method’s Motto: Vita est pro victus! Life is for LIVING — truly living! Not as some shell of who we could be, but as who we choose to be, right now.
I had to see my THINK•DO•BE Practice as a way of life…not a one-and-done…to become not only the Creative I choose to be, but — most importantly — the human I want to be:
Someone who trusts that I am not alone.
Someone who knows I can heal with the support of my true friends and family.
I was dedicated to this vision. That’s precisely why I started my FREE Private Skool Community: The Mindful VICTUS Playscape to build a supportive & safe community for Creatives to BREAK FREE from our F.E.A.R.s, one by one, to become the MVPs of our Creative Life!
For the first time, I sensed how different it felt inside my BODY to have this inner realization.
Because I didn’t feel this sinking feeling of fear in my stomach, and I didn’t freeze.
Instead, I shifted to this Mindset Reset: I could see the connection I’m maintaining with my remaining Subscribers and actually felt like our connection was stronger, because it’s full of people who resonate with this journey.
And that’s perfectly ok. I can let go of any Unsubscribers with a sense of peace and harmony.
And I do mean “harmony”:
In my mind’s eye, I can see how we are all participants in an orchestra, coming together with our own unique gifts and talents, and we can create a beautiful symphony of music with a much stronger signal, in a much clearer frequency when it’s not being muddled by those who do not resonate with the music that we are trying to create together.
As I tapped along to these thoughts, I could feel my inner vibration rising, as I turned to the most important part: BE.
I decided to BE not alone.I chose to BE in community.
And everything was different this time.
I felt peace, clarity, and gratitude, like I’d never felt before.
Instead of giving up, all by myself, I trusted the Universe to help me SOFTEN and LET GO of the mask, to show more — not less — of my true Authentic Self.
Not to the “wrong” people. But to the “right” ones: the fellow Creatives who “get it.” Creatives who are toiling away, like me, sharing their own Creative Work in public — in the same vulnerable way that I am.
And they helped me.
By validating how shitty it feels to see people unsubscribe. By reminding me that those unsubscribes are not a reflection of the quality of my work. By telling me how much they resonated with what I was doing. They saw value in my creativity and encouraged me to keep going.
In other words, the Creatives who’ve become my dear friends did what EFT does for me:
Their words were saying, “Even though this happened to you, you’re worthy of love & acceptance, exactly as you are.”
Isn’t that worth celebrating?
Even though we haven’t reached our final destination…
Even though we’re still on our way…
It is so healing to see this community — full of the right people — helped me to change the story my Monkey Mind was telling me, to cause me to doubt myself when I saw those Unsubscribes.
P.S. Before we raise the anchor, to set sail once more, let’s leave One Special Message In a Bottle
On the eve of my drafting this, the lesson in this cycle came full circle, from my mind and body, to my present-day experience:
I posted a Note on Substack, to share how vulnerable I felt sharing the Video of my playing piano and singing; and, now, I’d decided to be even braver: To show the Musician in me for the first time, to my friends in real life.
And guess what?
My friends were so warm, kind, and excited to see this Musical side of me!
And, guess what else?
I got 3 new Substack Subscribers, from that one Note alone!
Now, tell me you don’t believe in Synchronicity?
It’s like the Universe made space on our Community’s Ship: where a few mates left, three new Subscribers came.
And, I sense something magical happening:
The wind’s picking up in our sails.
And I can hear our community of music, powering the breeze.
It’s the amazing sound of our collective mental, emotional, and spiritual transformation.
On this journey of life, we are the instruments playing our own symphony, powering our sails from one shore to the next.
And I’m ready to set sail with you, my dear Subscribers,
Today and For Always.
Now, Take another Mindful Moment, to Go Inward:
⭐️ What does YOUR Highest Self say, when you look at your own Timeless EFT Tapping Map — in your Past, Present, Future?
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
……………………………..……………VIDEO is linked below………………………………………….🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
🤔 What if F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real) is easier to combat than you think? 🔮 Part 4 of 4
Chapter 8 — 🤔 When Fear Stops You Cold — is such a critical concept that we’re going to take concrete actions to battle our greatest challenge: F.E.A.R. — False Evidence Appearing Real. In this series, we explore what we can do together, to stop thinking and actually take action to combat it this month.
Think•Do•Be the MVP in Your Own Creative Life, inside the MINDFUL VICTUS PLAYSCAPE!
I strongly believe that taking action together — in community with other people who “get it” — makes a tremendous difference. It takes the sting out of doing anything new. It’s fun. And we can keep each other accountable.
Full Recordings are posted in my FREE Private Skool Community: The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, so please join me there. You can overcome one of your own F.E.A.R.s, but there’s no pressure to post a Recording of your own. Simply post what you feel comfortable posting. Even if it’s a simple comment to document what you did to move past your own fear that week. It’s the perfect opportunity to see & imagine what’s possible if you join us, to conquer your own fear. Whatever you decide, my complete Recordings will be posted there, and you can see me succeed or flop 🤣, as I battle the 4 F.E.A.R.s described here.
This week we’re learning to (4) Mindfully Let Music Carry You, For Always
My goal: — Meditation / EFT / Music — To blend meditation with EFT Tapping & music for fully-embodied tactile & auditory nervous system regulation.
MY MINDFUL REFLECTION:
I LOVE how all 4 of these weekly challenges bring our EFT Tapping Script to life, in how we choose:
To envision our own sense of Self (internal self-image);
To express our Self (using our own voice, via the spoken word or by singing);
To engage with the world, using the Self we choose to show others (with or without the mask that society expects us to wear); and,
To enervate our Inner Critic, using the subtle, yet immensely powerful, tool of EFT Tapping, to regulate our nervous system — no matter what we might be going through, internally or externally, in life.
Of course, nothing’s ever perfect but we made progress.
Each weak, we strengthened our ability to experience what it’s like to truly feel safe in our bodies, minds, and spirit…
To meet us as we are, wherever we happen to be in the present moment, with the wonderful words:
“Even though I feel X, I completely love and accept myself.”
YES, if you’ve been following alongside me, we each did it, individually, by ourselves.
Tapping, in the privacy of our own homes or cars or offices.
Wherever we might’ve been. Most often, alone. With no one else to observe our joy or our suffering.
This week, I want to bridge that divide, between our individual Self and the community of Creatives we’re building.
Today, I invite you to join me on SKOOL for this EFT Tapping Session, to heal the dreams we might have had when we were younger.
Now, take a Mindful Moment to:
⭐️ Close your eyes. Picture the child you used to be. And ask:
🔮What if you could heal your Inner Child, even now, after all this time has passed?
🔮What if your life was far from over?
🔮What if you had plenty of time to rediscover the joy you felt when you were young?
🔮What if it was not too late, after all?
⭐️Now, follow this EFT Tapping Script with me:
🔮 Side of Hand: Today, I’m tapping to reconnect with the Inner Child in me.
🔮 Top of Head: Even though it’s been a long time…
🔮 Eyebrow: I remember you.
🔮 Side of Eye: I see you.
🔮 Under Eye: I picture you.
🔮 Under Nose: I feel you.
🔮 Under Mouth: Even though it’s been a long time since I’ve given you a voice, I completely love & cherish you.
🔮 Collarbone: I carry you with me.
🔮 Under Arm: For always…
Repeat as many rounds as you like, and add a description that’s specific to you.
• Like, “I remember how you used to spend time outside, just enjoying the sun on your skin.”
• Or, “I picture how you loved to be silly and make your friends laugh.”
• Or, “I remember how you loved to sing and dance along to the radio.”
Then watch this Video — it’s the 1st time I’ve ever recorded myself playing piano while singing.
I chose this song because the name & lyrics of the song — “I Love You, Always Forever” — say it all.
MY VIDEO from Week 1 — Battling Stage Fright:
I LOVE how all 4 of these weekly challenges echo our EFT Tapping Script:
“Even though I feel X, I completely love and accept myself.”
And what a journey it’s been. From week to week, we’ve learned to go from merely thinking and planning, to worrying about it, to hearing the Monkey Mind’s excuses to avoid it, to tapping about it…
To actually doing it.
But that’s how we have to learn sometimes. To truly grow.
To embrace who we are — as is — perfectly imperfect.
And, music’s been the perfect pairing to our EFT practice.
It’s powerful, how the words and rhythms of music can elevate our state, and help us to relax into joy, peace, and Flow.
📚🎉📚
For a Limited Time only — you can download the
1st Book of The Obsidian Chronicles
(OBSIDIAN: Birth to Venus)
to read in the Kindle App or your preferred .epub Reader!
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
……………………………..……………VIDEO is linked below………………………………………….🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
🤔 What if F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real) is easier to combat than you think? 🔮 Part 3 of 4
Chapter 8 — 🤔 When Fear Stops You Cold — is such a critical concept that we’re going to take concrete actions to battle our greatest challenge: F.E.A.R. — False Evidence Appearing Real. In this series, we explore what we can do together, to stop thinking and actually take action to combat it this month.
Think•Do•Be the MVP in Your Own Creative Life, inside the MINDFUL VICTUS PLAYSCAPE!
I strongly believe that taking action together — in community with other people who “get it” — makes a tremendous difference. It takes the sting out of doing anything new. It’s fun. And we can keep each other accountable.
Full Recordings are posted in my FREE Private Skool Community: The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, so please join me there. You can overcome one of your own F.E.A.R.s, but there’s no pressure to post a Recording of your own. Simply post what you feel comfortable posting. Even if it’s a simple comment to document what you did to move past your own fear that week. It’s the perfect opportunity to see & imagine what’s possible if you join us, to conquer your own fear. Whatever you decide, my complete Recordings will be posted there, and you can see me succeed or flop 🤣, as I battle the 4 F.E.A.R.s described here.
This week we’re celebrating life with (3) Humor & Joy, in Community
My goal: — Singing karaoke, as a way to embrace Joy with others who want to do it with me.
Why not?
It’s worth celebrating LIFE, in all of its messy glory.
Without the need to be perfect.
Without feeling like we have to be polished all the time.
There’s so much to enjoy, when we simply bask in the joy of Being.
MY SINGING from Week 2 — Battling Perfectionism:
👇🥳 Press PLAY on the Audio attached to this Substack Post! 🥳👇
I chose this song because the name & lyrics of the song — “I Love You, Always Forever” — say it all.
MY VIDEO from Week 1 — Battling Stage Fright:
MY MINDFUL REFLECTION:
I LOVE how all 3 of these weekly challenges echo our EFT Tapping Script:
“Even though I feel X, I completely love and accept myself.”
And what a journey it’s been. From week to week, we’ve learned to go from merely thinking and planning, to worrying about it, to hearing the Monkey Mind’s excuses to avoid it, to tapping about it…
To actually doing it.
But that’s how we have to learn sometimes. To truly grow.
To embrace who we are — as is — perfectly imperfect.
And, music’s been the perfect pairing to our EFT practice.
It’s powerful, how the words and rhythms of music can elevate our state, and help us to relax into joy, peace, and Flow.
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
……………………………..……………VIDEO is linked below………………………………………….🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
🤔 What if F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real) is easier to combat than you think? 🔮 Part 2 of 4
Chapter 8 — 🤔 When Fear Stops You Cold — is such a critical concept that we’re going to take concrete actions to battle our greatest challenge: F.E.A.R. — False Evidence Appearing Real. In this series, we explore what we can do together, to stop thinking and actually take action to combat it this month.
Think•Do•Be the MVP in Your Own Creative Life, inside the MINDFUL VICTUS PLAYSCAPE!
I strongly believe that taking action together — in community with other people who “get it” — makes a tremendous difference. It takes the sting out of doing anything new. It’s fun. And we can keep each other accountable.
Full Recordings are posted in my FREE Private Skool Community: The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, so please join me there. You can overcome one of your own F.E.A.R.s, but there’s no pressure to post a Recording of your own. Simply post what you feel comfortable posting. Even if it’s a simple comment to document what you did to move past your own fear that week. It’s the perfect opportunity to see & imagine what’s possible if you join us, to conquer your own fear. Whatever you decide, my complete Recordings will be posted there, and you can see me succeed or flop 🤣, as I battle the 4 F.E.A.R.s described here.
This week we’re battling (2) Perfectionism
My goal: To overcome the fear of posting my singing, to accompany the song I recorded on the piano last week:
MY SINGING:
👇🥳 Press PLAY on the Audio attached to this Substack Post! 🥳👇
I chose this song because the name & lyrics of the song say it all:
I Love You, Always Forever
Feels like I’m standing in a timeless dream Of light mists with pale amber rose Feels like I’m lost in a deep cloud of heavenly scent Touching, discovering you
Those days of warm rains come rushing back to me Miles of windless summer night air Secret moments shared in the heat of the afternoon Out of the stillness, soft spoken words Say, say it again
I love you always forever Near and far, closer together Everywhere I will be with you Everything I will do for you I love you always forever Near and far, closer together Everywhere I will be with you Everything I will do for you
You’ve got the most unbelievable blue eyes I’ve ever seen You’ve got me almost melting away As we lay there under a blue sky with pure white stars Exotic sweetness, a magical time Say, say it again
I love you always forever Near and far, closer together Everywhere I will be with you Everything I will do for you I love you always forever Near and far, closer together Everywhere I will be with you Everything I will do for you
Say you’ll love, love me forever Never stop, never whatever Near and far and always and everywhere and everything Say you’ll love, love me forever Never stop, never whatever Near and far and always and everywhere and everything
I LOVE how this echoes our EFT Tapping Script:
“Even though I feel X, I completely love and accept myself.”
The song’s lyrics invite us to feel the calm comfort of a warm embrace…the warm embrace we can give ourselves, inside our body.
And, the song’s tempo steadies the frantic beat of our Monkey Mind, transforming the Reactive Loop of our anxiety into a deep exhale…
Until the stress simply “melts away.”
THIS is the power of music.
Just singing these words & tapping along to the positive beat and, I’m reminded, just how much happier I can be when I remember,
“I can root myself, not only in who I am now, but also who I want to grow into, to be.”
JUST IMAGINE…
How amazing it would be…
If all of us could serenade ourselves with these words & actually mean it — to love ourselves, wholeheartedly:
I love you always forever Near and far, closer together Everywhere I will be with you Everything I will do for you I love you always forever
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
……………………………..……………VIDEO is linked below………………………………………….🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
🤔 What if F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real) is easier to combat than you think? 🔮 Part 1 of 4
As I said last week, Chapter 8 — 🤔 When Fear Stops You Cold — is such a critical concept that we’re going to take concrete actions to battle our greatest challenge: F.E.A.R. — False Evidence Appearing Real. In this series, we explore what we can do together, to stop thinking and actually take action to combat it this month.
Think•Do•Be the MVP in Your Own Creative Life, inside the MINDFUL VICTUS PLAYSCAPE!
I strongly believe that taking action together — in community with other people who “get it” — makes a tremendous difference. It takes the sting out of doing anything new. It’s fun. And we can keep each other accountable.
Full Recordings are posted in my FREE Private Skool Community: The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, so please join me there. You can overcome one of your own F.E.A.R.s, but there’s no pressure to post a Recording of your own. Simply post what you feel comfortable posting. Even if it’s a simple comment to document what you did to move past your own fear that week. It’s the perfect opportunity to see & imagine what’s possible if you join us, to conquer your own fear. Whatever you decide, my complete Recordings will be posted there, and you can see me succeed or flop 🤣, as I battle the 4 F.E.A.R.s described here.
This week we’re battling (1) Stage Fright.
My goal: To combat the fear of posting myself playing piano, after not taking any piano lessons for years.
I upheld my promise: to show myself taking the smallest step, as I’ve encouraged us to do in my Video Poem, “The Littlest Shift,” that’s posted there, too.
In addition to the EFT Tapping Script I created below, whenever Fear whispered doubts in my ear, watching this Video Poem helped my Highest Self to remember: Some of the mightiest, most powerful personal transformations can happen in the Littlest Shifts.
Can you guess the song?
I’ve posted a snippet of the piano song here on Substack and, at the last minute, I decided to record & post this Video to go along with it!
I chose this song, deliberately. The name of the song says it all.
aaAnd the key of the song — C — has no sharps or flats, signifying how quickly and easily it helps me to root myself, not only in who I am now, but also who I want to grow into, to be:
I am someone who lost my way, who abandoned formal piano lessons as a child, but who wants, more than anything, to honor the Musician inside of me. Rooted in the belief that now is the perfect time, to rediscover what moves me, what enlivens me, what brings me joy.
Because it’s never too late for me. And it’s never too late for you, either.
Now, let’s go on this journey together, battling one F.E.A.R. at a time…
MY MINDFUL REFLECTION:
As I prepared this 1st recording, F.E.A.R. used all of its dirty tricks, telling me:
“You’re safer doing nothing.”
“Keep doing nothing. It won’t hurt that way.”
“Just watch: you won’t be able to do it. You don’t have a clue how to record anything!”
“Who are you kidding? You’re not a musician.”
“They’re going to laugh at you.”
So, of course, the logical, Left Hemisphere of my brain tried to take over, telling me I just needed more time to think about it, to plan and prepare and research.
Wasn’t Fear right, after all? I don’t know that much about recording equipment or recording programs.
And I did struggle to learn the logistics. The software. The wires connecting everywhere. The inputs and outputs. The mic — that’s still not ironed out. (Good thing singing’s up for next week, not this one.)
Overall, my mind was in a place called “Ughhh….”
There were so many excuses to not post. To postpone instead.
Fear just got louder, and more insidious in its tactics, whispering, “Sure, you said you’d do it, but would anyone blame you if you didn’t?”
It reminded me, “You even have a good excuse: that medical procedure you had to undergo, smack-dab in the middle of your week.”
Yup. That’s precisely how Fear was trying to keep me from…
What I actually needed: to simply DO IT.
To take action.
To stop planning or preparing.
To just press Record.
To post it, despite any mistakes.
To do the 1st rep, knowing that it would be just one of many reps on what I intend to be a lifelong journey to explore my love for music, to find joy, and fully express my Creative Self.
What I learned: Action really is the best option.
Not because my F.E.A.R. disappeared.
But precisely because it didn’t.
And, my doing it anyway — even imperfectly — was and is the fastest way for me to actually change how I see my own identity.
But, the most interesting part was, I was able to take concrete, transformative Action before I even played even 1 piano note:
The beat began when my Monkey Mind would not shut up.
It was playing a drum beat of war, at an increasingly frightening pace, and I could feel my amygdala flooding my body with stress hormones.
I wanted to freeze.
I wanted to run.
I wanted to flop.
Then, I remembered:
EFT is the perfect way to take back control:
In the privacy of my own home.
In the couple of minutes before I placed my hand on the keys.
In the precise moment that I opened the musical score and felt that resistance.
And I did it at the same tempo as my Monkey Mind’s percussive beats, in time with the crescendo beating on my amygdala’s drum.
As I said each and every fear that I was feeling with the setup statement (“Even though I feel X, I completely love and accept myself”) while tapping on the Meridian acupressure points, I addressing my fear on a somatic level. Inside my body. That was the fastest and easiest way to disrupt my Reactive Loop of planning-researching-endlessly-preparing-and-ruminating-on-the-what ifs.
And the best part?
That EFT tapping sent a powerful message to my mind: it was an Act of Self-Love, right now.
That settled the fear, because it showed my rational brain, “I’ve got my own back.”
Fear was trying to scare me, but those were simply thoughts. Fleeting. Changeable. Malleable. And, I reminded myself, You can choose which thoughts you listen to.
YESSS! EFT Lets Us Take Control, as an earlier Action point!
And, you know me: I love to use humor to make any change happen, so I came up with this fun Acronym. I playfully call this method:
S.Q.U.E.E. in the Face of Fear!
So we can take Action, before we do “The Do” we need to do:
Safely (Somatically)
Quit,
Understand,
Escape, &
Excite!
🔮 Safely — use the Somatic practice of EFT to soothe your nervous system to embody a felt sense of Safety that’s real at the physiological level: switching us to the Parasympathetic Nervous System’s well-regulated state of “rest and digest,” physiologically, chemically, and emotionally.
🔮 Quit — quit the Fear Loop in the present moment, right here, RIGHT NOW!
🔮 Understand — take time to give thanks and acknowledge this as the ACTION that it is: an Act of Self-Love! And bask in the loving-kindness you are actively giving your body, mind, and spirit!
🔮 Escape — like a dove you’re releasing from a cage, bring mindful awareness to YOURSELF by imagining your Highest Self opening the cage and allowing your Current Self to Escape the tyranny of this F.E.A.R. — not only right now, but FOREVER MORE! Because EFT tapping actually rewires your default, physiologically, chemically, and emotionally.
🔮 Excite! — use the power of your Ideation & Imagination to excite yourself! IMAGINE how amazing you’ll look & feel embodying the NEW Brave YOU!
🔮 In the Face of Fear — acknowledge that you’re taking action, not because Fear’s disappeared completely, but precisely because Fear is right here, knocking on your door, but you’re storming right past it. You close the door behind you, so it can’t get inside now or ever. Now you’re running fast, along the Path to Progress that YOU MINDFULLY CHOOSE, to reach the Destination of YOUR DREAMS—not anyone else’s!
Now, Take a Mindful Moment, to ask yourself:
⭐️ What F.E.A.R.s have been holding YOU back?
⭐️ Have you been stuck in an Anxiety Loop of thinking-studying-preparing-and-ruminating?
⭐️ Do you hear your own Monkey Mind, beating on your amygdala’s drum?
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
🤔 What if F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real) is easier to combat than you think?
In Chapter 8, we learn what to do 🤔 When Fear Stops You Cold.
This is such a critical concept that I’m going to dive deep into our greatest challenge: F.E.A.R. — False Evidence Appearing Real — and what we can do together, to stop thinking and actually take action to combat it this month.
I invite you to join me because I’m deciding right here & right now to TAKE CONCRETE ACTION to overcome 4 of my F.E.A.R.s for the next 4 Weeks, and I strongly believe that taking action together — in community with other people who “get it” — makes a tremendous difference. It takes the sting out of doing anything new. It’s fun. And we can keep each other accountable.
Please join me there if you want to overcome one of your own F.E.A.R.s. No pressure to post a Recording of your own. Please post what you feel comfortable posting. Even if it’s a simple comment to document what you did to move past your own fear that week. Or you just want to see…to imagine what’s possible if you join us, to conquer your own fear. Or, you can just watch me succeed or flop 🤣! In any event, here are…
The 4 F.E.A.R.s I’ll be battling in these Recordings:
Stage Fright — Combat the fear of showing myself playing piano, after not taking any piano lessons for years
Perfectionism — Overcome the fear of showing myself singing while I play piano at my current not-that-good level
Humor, Joy, Community — Singing karaoke, as a way to embrace Joy with others who want to do it with me
Meditation / EFT / Music — blending meditation with EFT tapping & music for fully-embodied tactile & auditory nervous system regulation
So, STAY TUNED…Wish me luck…& Come join me!
Now, let’s get to the meat & potatoes:
What’s the best way to combat our F.E.A.R.s?
You Bypass Thinking: UNLOCK Courage In the Body
Many times, when fear rears its ugly head, the logical part of our minds knows that our fear is irrational. But, as the Ortners point out, thinking that we’re just being “silly,” compounds the problem: it makes us feel shame.
THE TRUTH:
Despite how it might feel to us — especially if we experience the fear again and again, for days, weeks, months, or years — the Ortners remind us of this fundamental truth: “That [fear is] not your permanent identity. That’s just a Fear-Based Reactive Loop….”
It’s critical for us to actively remind ourselves that the basis of our F.E.A.R. is just “old programming that can be updated” (emphasis added).
THE PROBLEM:
Problem is: Our body often vetoes the brain.
The Ortners have a name for this predicament:
“The Law of Somatic Priority — When your logical mind and your survival brain (nervous system) disagree, the survival brain always wins. You cannot think your way out of a feeling problem. Your conscious mind can have all the statistics about flight safety, but if your body feels unsafe, your body will win that argument 100 percent of the time. It has veto power. This is why positive thinking and logical reassurances fail against deep fear.”
MY MINDFUL REFLECTION:
We’ve all experienced this.
Whenever we want to accomplish a goal — especially if it’s related to something new that we’ve never done before, or even things that we have done before, but have not become a part of our regular routine — we can find ourselves in the mental trap of spending too long preparing or practicing or thinking or ruminating about it.
For example, let’s consider the all two common scenario of wanting to get fit as a New Year’s resolution.
Imagine we’re someone who doesn’t feel comfortable going to the gym. Perhaps we have overindulged over the holidays. Or maybe we have failed to prioritize our health for years. We’ve morphed into the quintessential couch potato. We could stand to lose 30 pounds which isn’t that much weight. Aside from our close family and friends, not very many people would even have noticed that our pants are fitting a bit tighter around our waist.
So, what’s the big deal?
For whatever reason, whenever we picture ourselves going to the gym, we imagine tons of extremely fit, capital H, “Hotties” on all of the machines. Everyone using the free weights looks like they’re probably about to compete in some fitness competition where they’re striking poses on the stage.
Or we imagine that when we sit down to use a machine, somebody else is breathing down our neck because that machine’s a part of their regular circuit. So our poor nervous system is trapped in anxiety, worrying that we’re gonna take too long fiddling with the setup before we even hit our sets or reading the instructions to use the machine at all. Maybe we don’t know anything about keeping the proper form and we’re worried that we’re going to look like a chicken flapping our wings instead of doing deadlifts properly.
Who knows!
Let’s just imagine that all of these “silly” thoughts are going through our mind every single time that we picture ourselves walking into our local gym at the start of the new year.
Rather than jumping straight out of bed right into our tennis shoes and driving ourselves to the gym, to walk straight into that door to get on any machine whatsoever, even the simplest machine, we decide that we “have to” work on our nutrition first. I mean, what’s the point of walking into a gym if we haven’t ended our cravings from a fun week of holiday eating?
We tell ourselves, “It’s better to pick the best diet first.”
This sends us down the path of too many choices: there’s Low-Carb, Keto, Mediterranean, Paleo, a meat-only Carnivore diet, and everything in between.
Or, maybe we worry about our appearance so much that there’s no way we could possibly just wear a simple T-shirt and shorts to the gym. We’ve got to have matching ensembles so that we can look cute every day. Because, F.E.A.R. tells us, “That’s the way that we can make our New Year’s resolution stick.”
Or, maybe we tell ourselves we couldn’t possibly go to the gym alone, so we have to wait to get our Bestie to join us. Problem is, our best friend’s in an even worse predicament: they have even less knowledge about fitness and nutrition, and they’ve worked out even less than us, for even longer than we’ve neglected to exercise.
It’s not hard to imagine how thinking all of these “silly” thoughts might lead us down the wrong path. The path that diverts us farther and farther away from the simple task of taking the first step.
And, it’s also not hard to see how thinking these thoughts would provoke anxiety.
Personally, I don’t experience these thoughts anymore. After years of exercising, I finally feel comfortable at the gym. Yet, as I was writing this, I felt my heartbeat starting to race. My palms began to feel a bit sweaty. Isn’t that amazing? I can still picture myself using a machine for the first time, I can imagine people looking over at me, watching me fiddle around like I don’t know exactly what I’m doing, and — BAM! I can feel precisely how my body actively FEELS the anxiety described in everything I’ve written.
I can see exactly how thinking these thoughts would cause me to get trapped in an Anxiety Loop and F.E.A.R. whispers, ever so subtly, “Now is not the right time. You need to prepare more. You need to research more,” before I even open that gym door.
DUH! Of course F.E.A.R. makes us Lack Courage
It’s no wonder then that, when we’re faced with something new, we often think on some level the limiting thought, “I can’t do it, it’s just not meant for me, because I’m just not like that.”
And, when we look at other people who are successful at doing these things, we also have limiting beliefs when we automatically compare ourselves to them: We label them “Special,” and we label us as somehow “less-than.”
Like, “They know what they’re doing. They’re experts. They’re confident. Not like me.”
The reality is: they are not experts because they are confident.
They are experts because they started even when they were afraid.
And guess what? That mighthave been a short time ago. They might’ve just started last week!
And that distinguishing factor can be far simpler and smaller than we think:
Maybe they put in their reps for five days in a row, on this one and only machine.
They haven’t even tried the rest of the machines in the circuit, but we don’t know that.
We just think we know.
Bottom line: we assume.
And our Fear tells us that we are right.
Fear tells that we are safer doing nothing.
Fear tells us to keep doing nothing to stay safe.
Fear tells us that we just need more time to think about it, to plan and prepare and research.
And that’s precisely how Fear keeps us from…
What we actually need: to simply DO IT.
To take action.
To put on whatever sneakers we have as long as they fit.
To stop planning or preparing or making lists.
To just get in the car, drive to the Gym, open the door, and get on the easiest machine ever: the treadmill.
Taking action is always the best option.
Because it’s the fastest way for us to actually change how we see our own identity.
So what can we do to take action NOW?
First, we can acknowledge, we all know how hard it can be to take action.
Intellectually, we know that taking action is the shortest distance between point A where we are, and point B where we want to be.
But our Monkey Mind that thrives in our amygdala will not shut up.
Like it’s playing a drum beat of war, at an increasingly frightening pace, and it’s flooding our bodies with stress hormones.
So we stay frozen.
Or, we flop.
For weeks, we find ourselves laying on the couch and decide to start watching the entire Yellowstone series, and all of its many spinoff shows (1883, 1923, Yellowstone 2018-2024, Marshalls, & Dutton Ranch), from beginning to end, in chronological order.
What I love about this chapter is how the Ortners encourage us to TAP with EFT instead.
For me, EFT is the perfect way to take back our control:
In the privacy of our own homes.
In the couple of minutes right after we wake up.
In the precise moment that we are feeling resistance.
Perhaps even at the same tempo as our Monkey Mind’s percussive beats on our amygdala’s drum.
As we say each and every fear that we are feeling with the setup statement (“Even though I feel X, I completely love and accept myself”) while tapping on the Meridian acupressure points, we are addressing our fear on a somatic level. Inside our bodies. And that’s a fast and easy way of disrupting our Reactive Loop of planning-researching-and-endlessly-preparing.
Yes, the Ortners emphasize, the Reactive Loop of more thinking is precisely what has to stop: “To change the fear, you must speak the language of the body. Tapping is that language.”
I love how tapping allows us to literally tap into our bodies long before we are standing in the middle of the gym, wondering what to do with ourselves. Long before we’ve opened the gym door. Before we sit in our car. Before we rev the ignition. Even before we get out of bed or brush our teeth.
And the best part?
EFT sends a powerful message to our mind: it is a Concrete Action we can take that proves our Self-Love, right now.
That settles the fear, because it shows our rational brain that we’ve got our own back.
The fear is simply a thought. And we get to choose which thoughts we listen to.
Plus, the more we put in those body-&-mind reps, the more we can see that our fears are false. They are not necessarily true.
And, the more we take the actions that we want to take, the more comfortable, we will become with taking those actions, the faster those actions will become habits, the quicker those habits will become our regular routine. Until we’ve allowed ourselves to get used to trying one new machine per week, the 30 pounds we’ve been lugging around our belly has long since disappeared…
Until, one day, we realize the gym has become our home away from home.
We wake up with pep in our step.
And we love the smile plastered on our face.
Every time we look in the mirror, knowing that we are who we have chosen to become: healthy in body, mind, and spirit.
Which brings us back — full circle — to the commitment I made at the start of this post:
I’ll be combating the 4 F.E.A.R.s listed above, from week to week, because I’m done Thinking. I’ve done enough of that.
I’m devoting myself to Doing — not because I feel “ready” — not because Fear isn’t there — but, precisely because the F.E.A.R. is there — and, ACTION’s necessary to UNLOCK Courage in my body.
So, starting next week, we’ll practice taking ACTION with EFT, and I’ll share a fun way we can remember to use it when we need it most!
Now, Take a Mindful Moment, to ask yourself:
⭐️ What F.E.A.R.s have been holding YOU back?
⭐️ Have you been stuck in an Anxiety Loop of thinking-studying-preparing-and-ruminating?
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
I strongly believe that we are stronger together. That’s why I’m encouraging us to “do the DO” as a community, in a safe & private space for members-only, where we can embrace Becoming in all of its messy glory. So, let’s BREAK FREE, together!
Simply join The Mindful VICTUS Playscape to step into a 🏡Creative Home🏡 that’s sometimes cozy, sometimes crazy, and always creative!
We’ll be using the science-backed Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) to TAP into the power of MUSIC to regulate our Nervous System.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
Please join me in celebrating my publishing the 2nd Book in my science fiction series, THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES (a quick summary is below)!
I timed this book launch to align with my birthday so I could run a FREE Book Giveaway to celebrate!
So here are the links to download Books 1 & 2 for free during the 5-Day FREE Promotion Period that starts today, Wednesday Sept. 2, and ends on Sunday Sept. 6!
I’d be so grateful for your help and, as a thank you, I’ll be sending reviewers a fun digital bonus! Just send me a DM so I can send it to you.
Thanks so much for your friendship & support. It’s taken me a long time to honor the Creative in me, and sharing this journey with you means so much to me.
You can read the books on any Internet browser using the free Kindle website @ https://read.amazon.com/kindle-library (Or, you can download the free Kindle App for your phone by going to your phone’s App Store and searching for “Kindle.”)
I hope you enjoy the books!
Here’s the synopsis:
KIRKUS REVIEWS says Obsidian: Birth to Venus is an “engrossing introduction to…the [OBSIDIAN] series….[It’s a] fast-paced adventure [that’s] brimming with romance and revenge plots, capped by a frenzied, final act…. An indelible futuristic heroine headlines this Science Fiction opener.” — Kirkus Reviews (2020)
The year is 2116.
Scientists know why super-centenarians live beyond 100 years old. But, 66 years have passed since Dr. Jai Dean was born and she doesn’t look a day over 21. And, she’s only grown stronger with age.
She can see better than a bird of prey, pinpoint the vertical position of any sound, strike a target 600 meters away, and heal wounds that cut straight to the bone. For decades, she’s had no name for it, no label to define what she is, no way to understand her body or understand the power she holds. Jai lives on the run, determined to keep her family and secret safe.
Everything changes when scientists discover the Homo sentient, a new, superior species that can siphon other people’s energy to maintain their youth.
And for the first time, Jai’s not alone. What will she do when new friends become family, tensions rise, and humans and sentients are bent on destroying each other?
By the year 2121, the world breaks.
The War of Species between humans & Homo sentients erupts.
But, when friends become foes, who can win when the victors & the vanquished are one and the same: Americans, all?
Together, we rise.
Divided, we fall.
Jai’s future may be uncertain, but she knows who she is, and what she stands for.
For Jai, the answer is clear:
Family is defined by choice, not by birth or blood.
Family matters, and it’s worth fighting for.
Problem is, shadow forces are hunting her family from both sides, and there’s no escaping the truth:
Jai may be the most powerful sentient — and she’s still evolving — but, as strong as she is, with buried secrets, even her eyes are struggling to see
The battles we wage within are just as formidable as the ones we wage without.
THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES follow Jai as she’s haunted by her past and struggles to shape the future when human Homo sapiens no longer rank at the top of the food chain.
Will her psycho-obsidian blade be enough, to conquer the shadows before it’s too late?
I hope you enjoy the books!
🗡️🧠🔥The Psycho-Obsidian Blade in Me🔥🧠🗡️
🙏honors & respects🙏
🗡️🧠🔥The Psycho-Obsidian Blade in Each of You, 🔥🧠🗡️
Marisa
Thank You for Your Support
If my words have ever touched you, in my non-fiction Newsletter or in my creative writing, please know how much it would mean to me to have your support.
Writing these books have been a labor of love, sweat, & tears, not only because of the creative writing itself, but what it means to me — personally — as proof that I am championing my Creative Self and finally allowing her to be seen. It’s been quite the journey.
The metaphor of writing a book and giving birth to it as an author is very accurate. The nervousness, excitement, and desire to do it with love & care are spot on!
It’s thrilling to do it wholeheartedly, and I’m grateful to be on this journey with you.
I have always said that Substack is my Creative Home and it truly is. It’s emboldened me to honor the Creative in me, and it’s been a joy to encourage you to reach for the same. No matter what dreams you may hold in your heart, I trust we can help each other to be who we want to be, who we choose to be: living our lives fully— as our truest, most Authentic Self.
🗣️This book is science fiction at its best; it has drama, fantasy, thrilling adventure, suspense, danger, science, romance and more! It’s a fast-paced, captivating read. The story is very well developed and well told. The characters are multifaceted, likable and “real”. I was completely drawn into the action. Highly recommend this book to anyone!
🗣️The author combines many types of action (covert ops, shoot outs, martial arts) with a suspenseful sci-fi fantasy plot, emotional side stories, and some steamy sexy scenes, making this an exciting and fun page turner. The protagonist develops a strong sense of herself in a way that’s relatable and empowering. If you’re looking for an entertaining and thought-provoking read, I highly recommend this book!
🗣️This was a fabulous sci-fi read. The story line and characters were well developed; time-line changes were done well with no adverse effect on the story line. It was easy to see what was happening due to the writer’s portrayals of the characters and action. This was a “hard-to-put-down” book, so I finished it in one setting, which included hours into the early morning. I would suggest this book to anyone who is interested in science fiction. I am looking forward to reading the next book from this author.
🗣️Fun, emotional, and exciting! I really enjoyed reading this ebook! The characters are intelligent, funny, and relatable. It’s fast paced and engaging. I found myself fully enveloped in its world. I was sad when it ended, and very much looking forward to the next one!
📚🎉📚
If you enjoy reading OBSIDIAN, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon (links above) & on Goodreads!
It’s the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
🍵☕️Join our STUDY, SAVOR, & SUPPORT Each Other CHAT to study REWIRED: The Breakthrough Tapping Method to Stop Overthinking, Calm Your Body, and Finally Feel at Ease in our Monday book club, share YOUR “MESSY MIDDLE” by posting your Work In Progress (“WIP”) every Wednesday, and join our Notes & Posts BOOST every Friday!☕️🍵
🤔 What if there’s more to life than a hum-drum boring existence?
In Chapter 7, we learn what to do 🤔 When We Feel Numb. When we fall into our regular routines and do what is expected of us, but strangely, we feel nothing.
Like we are merely passengers in our lives.
We go through the motions, but we lack passion, excitement, or a true sense of purpose.
The Ortners call this a special type of reactive loop that they’ve dubbed “The Shutdown Loop.”
Unlike other potential reactions we might take, the shutdown loop is our nervous system’s most protective measure. To keep us safe, our Sympathetic Nervous System “pulls the emergency brake on all feeling to prevent overwhelm.”
My Mindful Reflection
Though I had never referred to this predicament as a “Shutdown Loop,” I am certainly familiar with this concept.
For me, years of repeatedly wearing the mask that I’ve been trained to wear, and have been praised for wearing as an Attorney, caused me to set aside the Authentic Creative in me. I stopped my creative writing. Didn’t make art. And slowly felt my Highest Self slip away until I could no longer recognize who I was anymore.
So of course joy became a stranger instead of my best friend.
Inspiration walked out the door, knowing that it would not become my regular welcomed guest.
And slowly but surely depression and anxiety became my far-from Bosom Buddies. They were more like squatters, refusing to leave, but eating all of my food, taking away all of my energy, not cleaning up after themselves, and making me just goddamn miserable.
Problem was…
I forgot that I was the Owner of my own Kingdom.
I forgot that I held the keys to my Palace. I forgot that I had the control to kick them out. To rearrange the furniture. To padlock the front door using the key that only I had.
That forgetting — that I had the power to change my own life — persisted for years.
I kept wearing that mask and hiding my Authentic Self and it became so painful that for a long time I denied that it was happening.
It wasn’t hard to deny because being an Attorney takes a lot of attention, effort, care, devotion, and passion.
It’s no surprise then, that the Ortners describe this Shutdown Loop this way:
“Maybe you’ve gotten so good at the performance that sometimes you fool even yourself. For a moment, you almost believe [it when you tell others] ‘I’m fine.’ Until you’re alone again, and the emptiness returns, reliable as gravity.”
Yes.
In those quiet moments when I came home, I knew that those squatters were hiding around somewhere. I knew they were a problem. I knew I didn’t want them around.
But I also felt powerless because Iforgot my own power.
Looking back, I can now see that that sense of Powerlessness caused me to go numb. As if my nervous system knew that it would be too painful to allow myself to fully feel the regret & remorse one feels when one becomes aware of the self-abandonment that is actually occurring.
Until I’d had enough.
When I published my creative writing (my sci fi series — THE OBSIDIAN CHRONICLES — linked below), I ejected my squatters and I clawed my way to freedom, restoring my Owner status, claiming the keys to my house, remodeled everything, did a ton of Creative Work to build my own Creative Castle, and installed an impenetrable mindset, to champion my new mantra — “Authenticity Over Performance” — like a moat to prevent any naysayers from busting their way back in.
But you know what’s so sad?
Millions of people never become their own Knight in Shining Armor.
Why?
The disconnection embodied in this Reactive Loop has become so normalized that we accept it.
We even have well-recognized nicknames for it, calling it the common “Rat Race” or referring to it as if it’s acceptable for us to be “Running on the Hamster Wheel.”
At least these descriptions express a tinge of anger at our predicament.
Or, worst of all, we refer to it in its completely emotionless form: “Adulting.”
As if we all just have to bear it. As if we all just have to stay stuck in our passionless, joyless suffering. Like we’re emotionless zombies, we simply sigh and tell ourselves (and sometimes others), “That’s just the way life is.”
No!
We have more power than realize.
We’re just trapped in “The Prison of Safety”
Our nervous systems have erected this wall, presumably to keep us safe from having to feel all of these so-called “negative” emotions because we’re afraid it will be too painful to fully experience them.
But, the problem is that the wall blocks out everything — even the positive emotions in our life:
This prison:
Erases our Inner Compass.
Makes true connection impossible.
Silences our intuition.
As the Ortners sum up quite succinctly, this prison may be protecting you from the risk of feeling, but “Numbness isn’t protecting you from life — it’s preventing you from living.”
The Solution:
Tapping to turn on the Slow & Steady Light Switch, from Numbness to a Life ILLUMINATED by Emotional Wisdom
To live our life well, as the full expression of who we truly are, we need to not only see, but acknowledge and experience the “full, colorful, and wide spectrum of emotion.”
EFT’s power lies in doing precisely that. We speak what we feel out loud, and acknowledge those feelings wholeheartedly, without pushing them away. And, as we tap on the meridian points, the piezoelectric signals we generate with our fingers, allows our bodies to accept that it’s not only ok to feel whatever we’re feeling, but it’s physiologically safe to feel those feelings.
Without our being triggered, we realize that these feelings cannot harm us or threaten our safety, contrary to what are brains and bodies believed at the beginning when it decided to numb us out.
That’s when the magic happens:
“The Law of Emergence”
“When suppressed emotions emerge, it’s not a setback; it’s progress.”
It’s like we’re disassembling the walls in our “Prison of Safety” and, as we break down those walls brick by brick, we can see, feel, and finally process the emotions that’ve kept us trapped.
Tapping on each emotion allows our brains and bodies to adapt to a new normal: to soften.
Brick by brick, we allow ourselves to let go. To let the bricks fall out of our hands.
Over time, our bodies and brains will realize a “Prison of Safety” doesn’t have to be erected to begin with. And we’ll know we no longer have to be prisoners who are too afraid to feel.
When we become our own Knight in Shining Armor, we gain the greatest wealth possible: Self-Worth.
Because we recognize we hold the power to illuminate our lives with Emotional Wisdom.
In fact, it’s our emotions that are the magic bricks to build our Castle.
A castle where we can live — TRULY live! — and champion our truest, most Authentic Self, no matter what’s happening externally in our life.
Now, Take a Mindful Moment, to ask yourself:
⭐️ When people ask you how you are, how often do you catch yourself feeling numb & thinking or saying these phrases:
“I’m fine.”
“Same old, same old.”
“Whatever.”
“I don’t care.”
“It is what it is.”
“Tired.”
“OK.”
⭐️ How often do you fall into your regular routine and do what is expected of you, but strangely, feel nothing?
⭐️ How many days a week do you feel numb?
🤔 Whenever I feel “numb,” I try to manage it by looking forward to what excites me instead. And I try to do something creative that enlivens me everyday…in the morning, if possible, so I see me prioritizing myself in some way before I tackle work or other tasks. Even if it’s just for a few minutes, doing something creative makes a difference and improves my mindset.
⭐️ What about you?
Let’s Rewire ourselves on the deepest, physiological level, right now.
If you enjoy reading it, please consider leaving me a rating & review on Amazon & Goodreads! It’s the the easiest way to support Indie Authors like me.
I strongly believe that we are stronger together. That’s why I’m encouraging us to “do the DO” as a community, in a safe & private space for members-only, where we can embrace Becoming in all of its messy glory. So, let’s BREAK FREE, together!
Simply join The Mindful VICTUS Playscape to step into a 🏡Creative Home🏡 that’s sometimes cozy, sometimes crazy, and always creative!
We’ll be using the science-backed Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) to TAP into the power of MUSIC to regulate our Nervous System.
Not as some shell of who we should be. But as our truest, most Authentic Self.
Here, we PLAY our way to success, using The VICTUS Method: the science-backed practice for us to THINK+DO+BE who we’re meant to be, by cultivating MINDFUL Creativity in Music, Art, Fitness, & Somatic Exercises to experience peace, joy, & flow.
Together, we will deactivate the Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn-or-Flop response of our Sympathetic Nervous System; and activate the Rest-&-Digest response of our Parasympathetic Nervous System, so we can all see how wonderful it feels to experience safety in our body, mind, and heart. 💜 Relax into our “Messy Middle” 💜 Celebrate our Becoming 💜 Champion our Highest Self 💜 Honor our Inner Child; and, remember that, when we are Mindful, we have the power to CHOOSE what’s best for us: To drop the mask 💜 Abandon perfectionism
Like/Comment/Share our creative work, so ALL of us can grow as Creatives.
⭐️ Until we can all proclaim this wholeheartedly:
♥️ “I deserve to explore Better Ways of Being.”
♥️ “I champion my Creative Self.”
♥️ “No matter what I’m feeling, I can love & accept myself.”
See you inside!
Choose a creative activity to pursue alongside me. Not necessarily the same creative practice as I’m choosing (music). But, the creative practice that YOU choose.
Together, we will experiment and PLAY.
P.S. No worries if you don’t have a Creative Practice yet. I’m planning fun ways to listen-to-learn piano, by going back to basics, so beginners will be right on time!
(3) If you’d like to see me succeed (or flop 😂) as I practice in public, SUBSCRIBE to my freeYouTube Channel!
(4) JOIN our private, members-only community in The Mindful VICTUS Playscape, where we come together to Share our creative work • Celebrate our “Messy Middle” • Silence our Inner Critic • Elevate our State • Experience safety in our body by regulating our nervous system • Motivate ourselves with creative carrots, not punishing sticks • Entrain our brains to adopt unstoppable self-belief • Practice loving ourselves • Stop taking ourselves so seriously • Lower our stress • ENJOY a Life that’s full of abundance & creativity!
Marisa VICTUS MINDSET & MEDITATION Synergy of Science & Self is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
